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Today, it was my first day at my new job. My new boss asked me if I was single. After telling him I have been happily married for 6 years, he fired me on the spot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42037) - you deserved it (2549)
On 06/22/2011 at 1:35am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)
Today, the only person I actually spoke with was a prank caller. I tried to have a conversation with him, but he hung up on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23169) - you deserved it (6697)
On 06/20/2011 at 10:59am - misc - by m2k (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I told my five year old daughter that no, she could not have ice cream for breakfast. She retaliated by pooping in the living room and smearing it on the walls. My in-laws, whom I've been trying to impress for ages, are visiting today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27561) - you deserved it (5192)
On 06/19/2011 at 2:03pm - kids - by screwedwoman27 - United States
Today, at the DMV, I was told to push my forehead against a vision testing device on the counter to activate a blinking light. When nothing happened, the employee started yelling for me to push harder. I tried again, only to knock the whole thing into her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21084) - you deserved it (2136)
On 06/19/2011 at 1:51pm - misc - by sabadaba - United States (Arizona)
Today, I got officially uninvited to a party. This is the third one this month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23112) - you deserved it (5918)
On 06/19/2011 at 4:44am - misc - by loser (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10628) - you deserved it (35851)
On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)
Today, I ruined my computer screen trying to kill a fly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8671) - you deserved it (26764)
On 06/13/2011 at 12:37pm - misc - by failure461 (man) - United States (California)
Today, my father decided to "prepare" me for the real world by telling me that I'm ugly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34582) - you deserved it (4412)
On 06/13/2011 at 10:22am - misc - by suze44 - United States (Washington)
Today, I started my new job at a restaurant. I am going to be the mascot that stands by the road to wave down customers in a heavy polyester animal suit. The high today is 102. I work 12-4. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27806) - you deserved it (4486)
On 06/09/2011 at 7:50am - work - by aeghw1s - United States (Missouri)
Today, while in class, I desperately had to fart. Someone in the room had a coughing fit, so I took that as the chance to let it out. When I was about to release, the coughing stopped. I couldn't stop in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15106) - you deserved it (29481)
On 06/08/2011 at 12:47pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was bored. Some people would've called up friends to hang out. Not me. I had the sudden urge to make an entire Excel Spreadsheet on how much I've spent on iTunes, month-by-month. I'm not sure what's worse, that I got really into it, or that I've spent nearly $800.00 on iTunes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11490) - you deserved it (20013)
On 06/07/2011 at 11:05pm - misc - by Mik (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, Twilight once again won all the awards at MTV, beating out Inception, Toy Story 3, Harry Potter, etc. This is MY generation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80999) - you deserved it (7243)
On 06/06/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by KillMeNow (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I bought a dog to make me feel less lonely. He ran away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44606) - you deserved it (5740)
On 06/05/2011 at 8:23am - love - by Loveless - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8141) - you deserved it (174345)
On 05/21/2011 at 2:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24474) - you deserved it (6282)
On 05/09/2011 at 10:34pm - kids - by richkief76 -
Monday 20 May 2013
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