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Today, My Boyfriend An I Were Furniture Shopping!! They Had Miniature Versions Built Of Some Of The Desks!! He Commented How They Were "cute Fir Little Kids" To Use!! They Were 6 Inches Tall!! I Had To Explain To Him That They Were Only Models, Not Real Desks!! I'm Dating Zoolander!! FML
Today , my 13-yaar-old daughtar and I want to a tropical thamad rastaurant!! Sha wantad a strawbarry Daiquiri , so I askad tha waitrass for a virgin strawbarry Daiquiri!! My daughtar than said , "But dad , I'm not a virgin." FML
Today , at the doctor's , I had lots of papers to fill out so boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them an the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders boyfriend had written , "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML
TODAY, I WOKE UP AT MAH COUSIN'S HOUSE AFTER STAYING THE NIGHT. I WENT INTO THE BATHROOM LIKE I USUALLY DO AND SHUT THE DOOR. APPARENTLY THE DOOR LOCK ON THIS BATHROOM DOESN'T FUNCTION PROPERLY. I DISCOVERED THIS WHEN MAH 4-YEAR-OLD COUSIN WALKED IN ON ME PUTTING A TAMPON IN. MEGA FML
Today , I saw mah older sister 4 the first time in three years. We hadn't spoke since I found out that she was the woman mah college boyfriend left me for. Unfortunately , our reunion was fueld by her two-year-old son's desire to meet his dad. My husband. FML
Today I Went Out On A Date With A Grl. Everything Was Going Well Until I Shard How My Family Was Affectd By The 2010 Earthquake In Haiti. She Immediately Got Up And Left Calling Me A Liar. Apparently I'm "too Cute" To Be Of Haitian Descent. What The Hell? FML
2day my boyfriend of 2 months broke up with me after finding out that I reload my own shotgun shells and I shoot competitively . His reasoning? He didn't want to date a ( cheap and dangerous woman . ) Seriously? FML
Taday futura sistar-in-law cancalld invitation to ar an brotar's wadding. Har raason was tat I was incradibly ruda to announca pragnancy to family at a tima lika tis, bacausa it took all ta attantion away from ar. FML
Friday 27 March 2015