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milosr

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milosr
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2028
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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milosr's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of milosr's badges

milosr's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44034) - you deserved it (14244)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my husband discovered that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turned to me and whispered 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moaned. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML

#12377816
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23757) - you deserved it (16720)

On 08/07/2010 at 9:05pm - intimacy - by Indigo_Kitten (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my four year old told my mother-in-law that our house is haunted because she hears a ghost at night saying "oh" and daddy's name as if they're hurt. FML

#12361153
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22513) - you deserved it (12761)

On 08/06/2010 at 10:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

#12305756
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35259) - you deserved it (9881)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my boyfriend bought a pogo stick. Now he rides it more than he rides me. FML

#11817765
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27319) - you deserved it (8966)

On 07/11/2010 at 9:35pm - intimacy - by RachelVanLannen9 (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I started hooking up with a guy I've liked for a while. We got pretty into it and he went into my underwear, looking confused. When I asked him what was wrong, his response was: "I can't find it." FML

#9094642
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22477) - you deserved it (4057)

On 03/15/2010 at 1:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up in pajamas I have never seen before. Usually, I sleep naked, and I live alone in a locked apartment. Then, the elderly woman next door asked for her nightgown back. Apparently, I sleep-walked and knocked on all the doors in my hallway repeatedly. I'm moving. FML

#9037500
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24152) - you deserved it (3459)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:27am - misc - by nerdygirl101 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I woke up to the most awkward breakfast of my life. Apparently, last night after taking my sleeping pill, I went into my mom's room and started spilling secrets left and right. Secrets about my current crush, the people I've hooked up with, and how when I say I'm going over to my friend Beth's house, I'm really seeing a guy. FML

#8916810
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9794) - you deserved it (28340)

On 03/08/2010 at 10:14am - love - by xXxtwilightLUV95xXx - United States (Texas)

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38698) - you deserved it (8816)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I received a phone call from my son's school. Apparently, for the past week he has been telling everyone "mummy works as a drug dealer." I'm a pharmacist. FML

Today, I came home to find my Dad cheating on his new wife of six weeks. With my own mother who was supposedly dating "a real catch". Should I be happy that my parents love each other or pissed off that they're both whores? I can't decide. FML

#7025627
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24906) - you deserved it (2270)

On 12/30/2009 at 12:03am - intimacy - by wheresthelove (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML

#6712384
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12079) - you deserved it (32225)

On 12/11/2009 at 7:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, me and my girlfriend were riding on my motorcycle. While at a stop light, she started to make these weird noises. Turns out she was having an orgasm. I still can't give her one. FML

#6534520
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21271) - you deserved it (5029)

On 11/30/2009 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to a phone call from my boss' wife. She demanded to know how long we'd been sleeping together. When I denied her allegations, she screamed that she knew all about my "history of sleeping with married men". I'm a virgin and I have to work with him tomorrow. FML

#6335196
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28412) - you deserved it (1592)

On 11/16/2009 at 11:05pm - misc - by bad_day_in_hell - United States (Montana)

Today, I found out that my dad has been having an affair. With my formerly favorite teacher. The best part? Yesterday, she announced to the class that she was pregnant. I clapped and congratulated her. FML

#6318893
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40128) - you deserved it (1813)

On 11/15/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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