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millertime911

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millertime911

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 11 September 1975 (39 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 177
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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millertime911's page activity

Visits<b>yehyeh</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 7:29pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 11:26am<b>Burton_Forever</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 12:39am<b>sushies1</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 11:00am<b>Wrex</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:26am<b>black_day</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 7:26am<b>Codyfootball</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 11:25pm<b>aron1991</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:59am<b>sprinkle90</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 10:29pm<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 5:29pm<b>LadyLelan</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:38am<b>Sathane</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:32am<b>almostchris</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 10:52pm<b>pollofrito1</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 1:04am<b>jahjustin</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 3:05pm<b>mechaix101</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 9:10pm<b>Urlastwurdz</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 10:23am<b>ijulez</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:50pm

Liked!<b>sushies1</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 6:10am

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millertime911's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a talk with my daughter about how I hope her first boyfriend is a special one because 'spending the night' with a boy is a big deal. She replied with a giggle, "Mom, I lost my virginity in a parking lot three years ago!" FML

#21362728
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28237) - you deserved it (5943)

On 02/24/2015 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by Like mother like daughter (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

#21362166
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31355) - you deserved it (2546)

On 02/23/2015 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sammy18f (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML

#21314442
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32410) - you deserved it (5315)

On 12/09/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

#21291810
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44071) - you deserved it (6584)

On 11/04/2014 at 7:03am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to a big job interview. As I walked in, I tripped and fell flat on my face. Other highlights include my voice cracking multiple times, sweating profusely and getting uncontrollable nervous giggling. The interviewer eventually stared at me in disbelief and asked if I was high. FML

#21285028
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33068) - you deserved it (4264)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:27pm - work - by not on life, that's for fucking sure (man) - United States

Today, I went on a first date. Everything was going well until he asked me, "So, what's the biggest thing you've stuck up your vag?" FML

#21281604
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38226) - you deserved it (2774)

On 10/20/2014 at 5:28am - intimacy - by bye loser (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML

#21234068
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33262) - you deserved it (8433)

On 08/10/2014 at 2:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML

#21234068
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33262) - you deserved it (8433)

On 08/10/2014 at 2:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I had to take a splinter out of my eight year old son's penis. FML

Today, for the third time this week, I had to clean up after someone who pissed themselves in the beer aisle at the grocery store where I work. FML

#21216504
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36806) - you deserved it (3125)

On 07/21/2014 at 5:15pm - work - by notpayedenoughforthisshit (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband told me he was going to search from store to store in order to find my birthday gift. What was he really doing? His girlfriend. FML

#21202458
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49200) - you deserved it (3872)

On 07/08/2014 at 1:41am - love - by rozsrredd (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML

#21199096
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47276) - you deserved it (9194)

On 07/05/2014 at 12:26am - intimacy - by bad in the sack - United States

Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML

#21187386
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44828) - you deserved it (5578)

On 06/25/2014 at 12:29am - misc - by pierced. - United States (Nevada)

Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML

#21173084
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46524) - you deserved it (5590)

On 06/13/2014 at 5:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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