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mike_rache

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mike_rache

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 January 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 126
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mike_rache : Derp.

mike_rache's page activity

Visits<b>Danny5146</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 11:56pm<b>Meta_Knight</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 6:00am

mike_rache's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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mike_rache's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving my 7-year-old daughter to school, when out of nowhere a bird smashed into the windshield. Instead of screaming or being traumatized by the gore like me, my daughter started laughing, eventually calling the bird a "stupid bastard". FML

#21190484
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46138) - you deserved it (8324)

On 06/27/2014 at 4:22pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Comunidad Valenciana)

Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML

#21185495
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49318) - you deserved it (5491)

On 06/23/2014 at 3:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I stubbed the same toe three times in fifteen minutes. How? My sister moved most of the furniture in the house to the left by a few inches, because she thought it would be funny to watch me get confused and suffer. FML

#21183245
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44677) - you deserved it (6544)

On 06/21/2014 at 3:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML

#21033101
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48402) - you deserved it (7546)

On 01/19/2014 at 6:21pm - intimacy - by Subliminal message (woman) - Switzerland

Today, I went to a nativity play. My husband showed up late and drunk, and I had to explain to him why booming "Yeah! Time to get baby Jesus up in this shit!" when our son was about to go on stage got us kicked out. FML

#21001530
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38854) - you deserved it (3943)

On 12/22/2013 at 4:28pm - kids - by bastard (woman) - United States

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

#21001267
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50157) - you deserved it (6940)

On 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by bleach bleach bleach (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

#21001182
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48902) - you deserved it (4871)

On 12/22/2013 at 10:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to basically ground my own husband, after he tricked our 6-year-old son into getting his tongue stuck to a frozen pole. FML

#21000259
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41340) - you deserved it (4402)

On 12/21/2013 at 2:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML

#20992325
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49120) - you deserved it (9120)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

#20798640
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56175) - you deserved it (11983)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:04am - intimacy - by suckstosuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55118) - you deserved it (64238)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML

#20586362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59834) - you deserved it (10747)

On 04/12/2013 at 11:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

#20533607
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55819) - you deserved it (14649)

On 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by RedWaters - United States



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