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midoridoll

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midoridoll
  • Town/Country : The Boring Tarpon Springs, Fucking USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 19 April 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 323
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About midoridoll : I. Am a smart ass and kinda a spaz. Ish boss

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midoridoll's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked downstairs with a couple of bags full of stuff, in preparation for a sleepover at my friend's house. My nine-year-old cousin looked at me and said, "Where're you going? Fat camp?" FML

#20064659
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15059) - you deserved it (2970)

On 09/09/2012 at 1:02pm - health - by Char (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML

#19026244
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21004) - you deserved it (2747)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that when my mom says she's going to kick me in the head to wake me up for an important interview, she actually means it. FML

#18763493
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11331) - you deserved it (16277)

On 01/10/2012 at 1:04am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I moved around a little, so my date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassed, giving me a reassuring look. FML

#18753577
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28823) - you deserved it (5573)

On 01/09/2012 at 1:14am - love - by Whyme (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

#18593025
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13364) - you deserved it (34595)

On 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and instead of saying goodbye, I got tongue-tied and said, "I love you, boo." FML

#18546937
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12345) - you deserved it (24265)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:36pm - misc - by Musicfreak (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad came to pick me up early for the Christmas break. He walked in on me cleaning all 19 of my sex toys. That's more than one sex toy per year that I've lived. I now have to face a 7-hour drive from Montreal to Toronto with him. FML

#18540985
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13690) - you deserved it (36471)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - intimacy - by Une Fille (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML

#18531722
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28387) - you deserved it (5164)

On 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by anne (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML

#18526714
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19189) - you deserved it (34513)

On 12/16/2011 at 9:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom admitted that she always makes me put away the dishes because my obsessive compulsive tendencies force me to arrange the glasses and silverware by size, just the way she likes them. FML

#17747814
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20757) - you deserved it (4248)

On 09/14/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by Awesome. (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, this girl who has been stalking me for almost 7 months sent me a 12 page text comparing her love for me with her passion for cheese. FML

#17547922
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30981) - you deserved it (3003)

On 08/22/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by Say Cheese - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend found out that if guys eat fruit often, their sperm will taste better. He bought a can of fruit for himself to eat, and said that he bought it just for me. This is the most romantic thing he's ever done. FML

#17446772
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34411) - you deserved it (6902)

On 08/12/2011 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Pissedoff777 - United States (Arizona)

Today, at 21 years old, I am still so flat chested that I can't even fit into training bras meant for 12 year olds. FML

#15679727
590 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48049) - you deserved it (5152)

On 04/07/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by nerdsgetmehot (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got to listen to my younger brother have sex with a girl while I sat in my room playing World of Warcraft on a Friday night. FML

#14504771
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19314) - you deserved it (36849)

On 01/08/2011 at 2:01am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I fell asleep in my math class. Turns out I sleep walk. I woke up at the front of the room with chalk in my hand, scribbles on the board behind me, and the whole class laughing at me. FML

#13048948
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22748) - you deserved it (6670)

On 09/14/2010 at 2:32pm - misc - by sleepwalker - United States (Georgia)



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