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michelleissexy

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michelleissexy

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1909
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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michelleissexy's page activity

Visits<b>BellaMuerte666</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 3:40pm

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michelleissexy's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

#7290118
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27876) - you deserved it (3704)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I saw what I thought was a gallon jug of water. Trying to do something spontaneous and fun, I took my hardest swing at it to see how far I could kick it. It was frozen solid. I broke my foot. FML

#7261047
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6841) - you deserved it (38536)

On 01/10/2010 at 4:46pm - misc - by tnt007 - France

Today, I fell asleep while masturbating. I'm so bad that I bore myself. FML

#7100685
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18672) - you deserved it (6500)

On 01/02/2010 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Lonely (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I came home from a year long backpacking trip in Europe. During my absence my parents divorced, dad took the house and most of the money, sister is seven months pregnant, brother was arrested for statutory rape, and my mom pawned all my stuff to buy booze to "cope." Oh, and my fish died. FML

#6989911
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83967) - you deserved it (4753)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML

#6842444
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39987) - you deserved it (3174)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found my underwear in my brother's pillow as well as my vibrator and Victoria's Secret magazines. FML

#6841457
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23387) - you deserved it (3173)

On 12/20/2009 at 2:13am - intimacy - by VCR (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12160) - you deserved it (37622)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a repairman woke me up so he could change the filter in my furnace. This would have been fine, except he didn't wake me up until he was already in my room, where I was sleeping naked. FML

#6701307
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24598) - you deserved it (4009)

On 12/10/2009 at 10:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I fell asleep with my hands down my pants. I woke up to an excruciating pain coming from my genitalea. It turns out that I was having nightmares and I squeezed my balls because I was so terrified. I popped 3 blood vessels in my scrotum and now walk with a limp. FML

#6635616
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23641) - you deserved it (9534)

On 12/06/2009 at 3:42pm - intimacy - by Ballhugger (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to take a test that's required to pass the class. The test administor told us that those of us who were wearing hoodies would have to take them off. I would have taken mine off, but I was only wearing a bra underneath. There's no other days I can reschedule the test. FML

#6595557
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31757) - you deserved it (12822)

On 12/04/2009 at 2:55am - misc - by wearashirt (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML

#6583595
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22153) - you deserved it (3164)

On 12/03/2009 at 12:50pm - intimacy - by Silent - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, at 4am, I remembered that I had not studied for my Spanish exam. I panicked, jumped out of bed, and frantically began searching for my notebook. It wasn't until I destroyed my desk and woke up my roommate that I realized that I'm not enrolled in Spanish this semester. It was a nightmare. FML

#6537885
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31367) - you deserved it (8756)

On 11/30/2009 at 7:19pm - misc - by Stressmess - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

#6298765
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18644) - you deserved it (32313)

On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I told my boyfriend how happy I was with him. He responded by pulling down his pants and slapping his ass. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. FML

#6268851
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32737) - you deserved it (5391)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:11am - love - by neuroticallyours (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I ran out of my usual hand lotion that I use for 'me time'. I instead decided to try and us my after shave lotion as a replacement. Apparently, my member doesn't agree with one of the ingredients, and has now swollen to the size of my fist. FML

#6160580
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5779) - you deserved it (27274)

On 11/04/2009 at 11:17pm - intimacy - by Metime (man) - United States (New Hampshire)



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