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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3743) - you deserved it (47901)
On 02/23/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by nutcracker (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)
Today, I was awakened, in the middle of the night, by the sound of crying coming from outside. There's a mile in between houses where I live. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22595) - you deserved it (1816)
On 02/22/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by holycow (man) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend joined a group on Facebook called 'Swallow. Or it's going in your eye.' Today I also found out that my boyfriend takes Facebook groups very seriously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13994) - you deserved it (3098)
On 02/19/2010 at 9:27am - intimacy - by kit_kat14 (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I made heart shaped cookies for my girlfriend. My mom's reaction? "They look like dicks." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12365) - you deserved it (2581)
On 02/14/2010 at 9:16pm - intimacy - by adam - United States (Illinois)
Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13171) - you deserved it (3616)
On 02/14/2010 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by klsdhjla (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6128) - you deserved it (24568)
On 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by CrappyValentine (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14111) - you deserved it (3961)
On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was in the car with my 16 year old daughter. There was a guy on a fast looking motorcycle next to me at the stop light. I yelled to him to "get it up!" so that he would do a wheelie. Just before the light turned green he yelled back, "You're too old for me, but I'll get it up for her!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (5396) - you deserved it (17206)
On 02/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my mom woke me up and asked if I wanted breakfast. I had passed out naked on the kitchen floor after a party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5351) - you deserved it (26279)
On 02/03/2010 at 3:10pm - misc - by adam - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was bet 100 dollars that I couldn't break a piece off a brick with my head. I couldn't, and I have 2 gashes in my head now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2617) - you deserved it (48793)
On 01/21/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16735) - you deserved it (6130)
On 01/20/2010 at 6:19pm - health - by M_Kclift1994 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, my female room-mate decided to throw away my xbox, along with a few other possessions because they reminded her of her ex. Furiously, I asked her if "it was that time of the month again." Now I can't feel my balls, and miss my games. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29675) - you deserved it (9264)
On 01/19/2010 at 10:59pm - misc - by NYCguy (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my mom asked me to clean beneath my brother's bed for money. I found a rotten apple, a picture of my best friend, and a dead bird. I got $10. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21542) - you deserved it (3251)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:04pm - kids - by Brotherssuckkk - Sent from mobile version
Today, my girlfriend asked me "is it in yet?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19217) - you deserved it (4376)
On 01/14/2010 at 9:06am - intimacy - by anun (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my girlfriend asked me "is it in yet?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19217) - you deserved it (4376)
On 01/14/2010 at 9:06am - intimacy - by anun (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Monday 17 June 2013
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