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michelleissexy

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michelleissexy

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  • Number of visits : 1776
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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michelleissexy's page activity

Visits<b>BellaMuerte666</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 3:40pm

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michelleissexy's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my anal virginity because my boyfriend "slipped". FML

#11117532
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52348) - you deserved it (21226)

On 06/11/2010 at 12:56am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I am 9 months pregnant. I had a dream where I successfully pushed and gave birth to my son. Meanwhile, in the real world, I successfully pushed and gave birth to a large dump. FML

#11011756
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42857) - you deserved it (6439)

On 06/06/2010 at 2:31pm - kids - by Annakins (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out my boyfriend keeps a gun under his pillow. This was only after my friends and I surprised him with his birthday cake while he was sleeping. FML

#10940530
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29557) - you deserved it (6267)

On 06/03/2010 at 8:23am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML

#10911486
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34392) - you deserved it (5568)

On 06/01/2010 at 7:56pm - intimacy - by Amb (woman) - United States

Today, I fell asleep in class. If that wasn't bad enough, I awoke gasping for air. I almost drowned in my arm fat. FML

#10678827
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10521) - you deserved it (36857)

On 05/21/2010 at 10:41pm - health - by guyshithappensto (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML

#10667407
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45913) - you deserved it (13631)

On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML

#10433872
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36605) - you deserved it (9478)

On 05/09/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by imustbegay - United States

Today, the love of my life sent me a text saying "touch my pork". Somehow I don't think my feelings are mutual. FML

#9181615
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19520) - you deserved it (3761)

On 03/18/2010 at 6:24am - intimacy - by burgeee - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I was walking down the street when I heard a loud splashing noise to my right. I looked over only to see a woman not squatting but bending over, spreading her cheeks, peeing a horse-sized amount of pee. I can't un-see this. FML

#9143571
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36704) - you deserved it (2923)

On 03/16/2010 at 9:34pm - misc - by disturbed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML

#9066532
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21064) - you deserved it (9124)

On 03/14/2010 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was eating a hotdog. My huge Siberian Husky, upon becoming aware of this, jumped up on me. He forced his tongue into my mouth and ate the food I was in the middle of eating. FML

Today, the bartender pulled me aside and told me that she saw my date slip something into my drink. Who was my date? My husband of four years. FML

#8790917
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31395) - you deserved it (2325)

On 03/03/2010 at 12:37am - misc - by holycrap (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out my little sister is a pyromaniac. She set my bed on fire. FML

#8775610
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24485) - you deserved it (2264)

On 03/02/2010 at 4:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

#8742333
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9396) - you deserved it (37227)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:13am - animals - by ItHurtsLIkeHell (man) - Malaysia (Pulau Pinang)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. I was late for work so I went to smash the side window with a big rock. The rock bounced off the window and into my face. FML

#8706906
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9035) - you deserved it (28385)

On 02/28/2010 at 12:36am - work - by chevysprint (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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