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michelleissexy

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michelleissexy

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  • Number of visits : 1734
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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michelleissexy's page activity

Visits<b>BellaMuerte666</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 3:40pm

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michelleissexy's favorite FMLs

Today, at the gym, I saw this really pretty girl. Trying to impress her, I started lifting with heavy weights. One of the weights slipped out of my hand. I then dropped the other one, trying to make it seem like it was on purpose. I dropped the weight on my phone. I squealed. She giggled. FML

#547480
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11181) - you deserved it (80658)

On 03/23/2009 at 1:42am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend was really stressed about a guy he works with being a jerk. I told him "if you ignore something long enough, it won't bother you anymore." His response was "I've ignored my herpes for a long time but it still bothers me." We've been having sex for 3 months now. FML

#511174
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (125965) - you deserved it (20344)

On 03/21/2009 at 3:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML

#459087
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28234) - you deserved it (104228)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by JohnMackSquirts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was out with my friend. My six year old daughter was also with us. While we were walking through the parking lot, my daughter asked me in a very loud voice "Mommy, does a blow job taste bad?" FML

#360907
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71518) - you deserved it (16543)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by hala (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom told my boyfriend all about how she had to be a parent volunteer when I was in kindergarten. Apparently I used to masturbate in class by rubbing myself against the edges of chairs and tables. The teacher thought it would be best if my mom was there to make me stop. FML

#280083
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (140565) - you deserved it (15736)

On 03/12/2009 at 7:24am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I fell asleep in the car on a 10+ hour trip with my family as soon as we got on the highway. When I woke up an hour later, I realized I'd had a wet dream. I had to sit next to my grandma with semen all over my thighs and boxers for the rest of the trip. FML

#278978
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72778) - you deserved it (10337)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:30pm - misc - by MoneyMike (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was having birthday dinner with my girlfriend and her parents, when her Dad asked what I got her she replied "He said he was going to give me a Pearl Necklace when we get home." I realized then that my girlfriend did not know what I meant by 'Pearl Necklace.' FML

#250417
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24544) - you deserved it (87594)

On 03/09/2009 at 9:35am - intimacy - by Ethan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was having birthday dinner with my girlfriend and her parents, when her Dad asked what I got her she replied "He said he was going to give me a Pearl Necklace when we get home." I realized then that my girlfriend did not know what I meant by 'Pearl Necklace.' FML

#250417
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24544) - you deserved it (87594)

On 03/09/2009 at 9:35am - intimacy - by Ethan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I woke up at 5:30 AM to my boyfriend flipping on the lights and shouting, "We have a problem!" Our chinchilla had gotten out of his maximum security cage, and half of our apartment is now underwater because he decided the water line that leads to the fridge would make a tasty midnight snack. FML

#208804
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50815) - you deserved it (8272)

On 03/04/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by Sara (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, to remind myself to write a check for my speech and debate team (Lynbrook Speech and Debate), I wrote "LSD money" on the back of my hand. The Vice Principal saw it, dragged me to the office, and called my parents. FML

#204455
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47674) - you deserved it (13701)

On 03/04/2009 at 2:05am - money - by gonkc (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was coming over so I bought this sexy corset, some fishnets, stilettos and see-through thong. After my dad left I dressed up and a few minutes later the doorbell rang. I answered it, whip in hand. It was my dad. He forgot his keys. I'm grounded. FML

#170978
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46589) - you deserved it (157285)

On 03/01/2009 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by thissucks (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML

#170218
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54669) - you deserved it (14284)

On 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by Scottrick (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend masturbating so I said to her, "Need a hand with that?" to which she replied "I'm doing fine here on my own, don't ruin it." FML

#112379
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84755) - you deserved it (21044)

On 02/23/2009 at 8:14am - intimacy - by Anonn (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was having sex with a girl I really like for the first time. After a while I told her I was about to come. Her response: "Lucky you." FML

#69948
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50894) - you deserved it (20822)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:07pm - intimacy - by sadguy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got up at 5am, brushed my teeth, shaved and showered to get ready for work only to step barefoot in a huge pile of dog crap in the middle of my living room floor. I don't own a dog. FML

#7193
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38514) - you deserved it (1883)

On 02/04/2009 at 2:53am - animals - by RustyBulletHole - United States (Illinois)



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