michaelaranda

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michaelaranda

45Fucked!

  • Town/Country : San Francisco, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 August 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4213
  • Number of comments : 202
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 34 posted

About michaelaranda : Im Brian and im from the bay area. Message me if you want to.

Also, if i landed on your profile, i pressed the "fucks" button, regardless of who you are.

michaelaranda's page activity

Visits<b>NerdGirl321</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 1:13pm<b>gagvl12</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 2:27pm<b>junjunbun</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 11:13am<b>ThatFMLKid101</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 6:54pm<b>1HateMyUsername</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 2:42pm<b>IdntNOthePASS</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 4:26pm<b>TStiles</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 10:02pm<b>BoredomIsReal</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:51am<b>secondgradesucks</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 4:48pm<b>dmo4</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 1:32pm<b>MangoLoco</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 8:49am<b>dinosarefriends</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 3:20pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 6:49am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 7:04am<b>jarlballin</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 7:19am<b>GhastlyLeek</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 9:41am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 7:21am<b>mimiminx</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 5:19am

Fucked!<b>dinosarefriends</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 9:20pm<b>keiNan</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 7:42am<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 6:33pm<b>yoshi061</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 7:08am<b>vriskahs8</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 6:09pm<b>kkkiiitttyyy</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 5:44pm<b>twister45</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 5:09am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:22pm<b>Sansa</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 10:40pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 7:23pm<b>blondbombshell13</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 8:07pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 3:05pm<b>dmo4</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 9:12pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 6:05am<b>AQueenOfDeath</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:55am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:14am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 3:36am<b>kitkat818</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 8:21pm

michaelaranda's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of michaelaranda's badges

michaelaranda's favorite FMLs

Today, for what has seemed to be the hundredth time, my labeled bagged lunch was stolen from the fridge at my workplace. I stormed into my boss's office ready to complain, only to find him eating it. FML

by Jake Leiter / 03/20/2016 at 2:12pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Work

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend's attention by taking my bra off and tossing it at him. He only put it on as a hat and kept playing his video games. FML

by Anonymous / 03/18/2016 at 4:56pm / United States / Love

Today, I went straight from work to a blind date, and I decided to change in my car at the parking lot. Someone pulled up next to me as I had my ass to the window. It was my date. FML

by ANON / 03/18/2016 at 12:04pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I found out that my sister's kids refer to me as their 'Druncle'. I guess I have to admit to myself that I'm an alcoholic. FML

by drucle / 03/18/2016 at 8:49am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Health

Today, after asking my hubby for what seems the millionth time to stop shoving his finger into my bum crack, I thought it would be funny to give him a taste of his own medicine by doing it to him. Right as my finger was in his crack, he let loose a huge fart. FML

by Grimmy / 03/17/2016 at 4:12am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my father informed me that I will have no chance of dating a good man if I keep up with these interracial relationships. And that he won't be supporting me through college if I continue this "rebellion." My boyfriend is half black and loves the same music, sports, and movies as my dad. FML

by katiebird / 03/16/2016 at 4:51pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had sex with a guy I really had a connection with. It went perfect until I complimented how his moans during sex turn me on a lot, and he responded with, "That's what my mom told me." I laughed so hard we couldn't go on. FML

by UnicornWaffles / 03/16/2016 at 1:23pm / Taiwan (T'ai-pei) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend of 5 years gave me the "I'm not in love with you anymore" speech. I saw it coming, so I'd planned to play it cool by saying, "If you're sure it's something we can't fix, I'd rather not talk about it". After a while, I realised I was just sitting there like a child, fidgeting and shaking. FML

by Satch / 03/16/2016 at 5:04am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, for my birthday my friend bought me a book on how to lose weight. FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2016 at 4:25am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an accident at work. Not the kind involving worker's compensation. The kind involving desperately scrubbing my office chair with paper towels, before going home to change my pants. FML

by shart / 03/08/2016 at 9:48pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, my friend used my phone to tag some of my overweight Facebook friends in a weight-loss video, along with the comment "Here's some motivation, fatasses!" I was able to delete the post, but not before I got a bunch of angry messages. FML

by jwill200 / 03/08/2016 at 1:02pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my dad thought it was perfectly acceptable to ask my girlfriend how many guys she screwed before me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2016 at 12:57am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother asked me what I want for my birthday, so I said that we could just hang out. He told me I should ask for something more realistic, like a gift card. FML

by MitchRapp / 03/04/2016 at 5:11pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML

by IhadToTakeCareOfTraumatizedFish / 03/03/2016 at 12:32am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I'm so sleep-deprived, I got a boner from just thinking about falling asleep. FML

by MrAries / 03/02/2016 at 6:45am / United States / Health