michaelaranda

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Offline (17 hours ago)

michaelaranda

45Fucked!

  • Town/Country : San Francisco, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 August 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3644
  • Number of comments : 199
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 34 posted

About michaelaranda : Im Brian and im from the bay area. Message me if you want to.

Also, if i landed on your profile, i pressed the "fucks" button, regardless of who you are.

michaelaranda's page activity

Visits<b>ThatFMLKid101</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 6:54pm<b>1HateMyUsername</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 2:42pm<b>IdntNOthePASS</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 4:26pm<b>TStiles</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 10:02pm<b>BoredomIsReal</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:51am<b>secondgradesucks</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 4:48pm<b>dmo4</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 1:32pm<b>MangoLoco</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 8:49am<b>dinosarefriends</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 3:20pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 6:49am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 7:04am<b>jarlballin</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 7:19am<b>GhastlyLeek</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 9:41am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 7:21am<b>mimiminx</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 5:19am<b>scarlett3diaz</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 1:44am<b>keiNan</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 1:42am<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 5:47am

Fucked!<b>dinosarefriends</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 9:20pm<b>keiNan</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 7:42am<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 6:33pm<b>yoshi061</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 7:08am<b>vriskahs8</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 6:09pm<b>kkkiiitttyyy</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 5:44pm<b>twister45</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 5:09am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:22pm<b>Sansa</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 10:40pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 7:23pm<b>blondbombshell13</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 8:07pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 3:05pm<b>dmo4</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 9:12pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 6:05am<b>AQueenOfDeath</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:55am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:14am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 3:36am<b>damnitstrue</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 8:33am

michaelaranda's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of michaelaranda's badges

michaelaranda's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw my grandfather on the train, with his cock out. FML

by OhDearGodGrandad / 02/07/2016 at 12:59pm / United Kingdom (Redbridge) / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally forwarded a link to a weird fart porn video to my chat group. They've been silent for 30 minutes now. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2016 at 12:55am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my now ex-boyfriend accused me of wanting to screw his 11-year-old brother, all because I expressed interest in going to his birthday party. FML

by Anonymous / 02/05/2016 at 9:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, while on the tram with my friend, we ended up discussing religion. When we started talking about God, some guy asked us, in a serious tone, to "stop talking about me" because it was really starting to bother him. FML

by DieuEstUnHomme / 02/03/2016 at 10:44am / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Transportation

Today, at my job drug testing high schoolers, I see that one of the kids selected for the testing looked incredibly high. So, after he goes in the bathroom and gives me his cup with his urine inside, I take a closer look and see that the little shit jizzed in the cup. I hate my job. FML

by zachhewett / 02/02/2016 at 5:53pm / United States (Alabama) / Work

Today, my parents have deliberately ruined my last 2 relationships, because they want me to get back together with my ex simply because he is my son's dad. Apparently, my son needs his father more than I need a man who won't beat me every time he gets drunk. FML

by anon / 01/31/2016 at 4:38pm / United States / Work

Today, I accidentally walked in on my sister shaving, naked. I don't know what's worse, the fact I've now seen her nude, or that she looks ten times better than any girl I've ever slept with. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2016 at 4:33am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my grandpa that I want to join the police force. His response: "You wanna lynch some blacks without the jail time, eh?" FML

by onlyjuggalos / 01/31/2016 at 3:13am / United States / Work

Today, I called the cops on my elderly neighbor for blaring loud war music yet again. They chatted and laughed with him on his lawn for a good half hour. As they left, he slapped the female officer's ass, only for her to just giggle about it. After they drove off, he fired up his music again. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2016 at 12:07am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was feeling terrible and posted on Facebook about how I was stressed out and feeling really lonely. My sister replied saying "#fatfuckproblems". 13 people liked it and some so-called friends posted stuff like "rekt" and "SLAYED, bitch!", all in less than a minute. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2016 at 2:12pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

by sweetie808 / 01/28/2016 at 3:39am / United States (Hawaii) / Animals

Today, I was leaving the house to go on a date. My dad stopped me at the door and said confidently, "Tear that pussy up, son." I'm gay and my dad knows that. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2016 at 8:24pm / Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional) / Intimacy

Today, I twisted my knee while cutting firewood with my grandpa. The pain was so crippling, I fell over screaming. His response? "Quit your bitching, I had my kneecaps blown off in Vietnam. They had to stitch 'em back on." He's never been to Vietnam, or even out of the country. FML

by fuckoffgramps / 01/24/2016 at 12:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, I found out my family refers to my room as "the virgin cave". FML

by Dexter_39476 / 01/24/2016 at 12:40am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the huge project I've been working on for the past week is actually a group project. Everyone in my group knew. They were just letting me do the entire thing by myself because I'm "smart". FML

by AkiAnime / 01/21/2016 at 7:02pm / United States (California) / Work