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michaelaranda

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michaelaranda

16Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2067
  • Number of comments : 184
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 32 posted

About michaelaranda : Im Brian and im from the bay area. Message me if you want to.

I have no idea what the "fucks" button means, but im giving them to everyone now.

michaelaranda's page activity

Visits<b>hallieee</b> - 18 hours ago<b>LilsBills300</b> - yesterday at 12:32am<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 4:38am<b>GhostDuck</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 12:15am<b>Ajf92002</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 3:26pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:36pm<b>TStiles</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 9:21pm<b>ZelmaSlayer</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 11:47am<b>chandler88</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 11:59pm<b>Koizumie</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 10:40pm<b>3DTOM</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 9:59am<b>pabj208</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 4:55am<b>toma1945</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 10:45pm<b>MrsHaxxo</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:54pm<b>ActionFearo</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:40pm<b>amandalynn84</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 2:35pm<b>silentlyhannah</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 2:26pm<b>SaltyC</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 2:06pm

Fucked!<b>hallieee</b> - 12 hours ago<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 5:43am<b>GhostDuck</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 10:46pm<b>Ajf92002</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:26pm<b>amandalynn84</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 8:35pm<b>DamnBailie</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:59pm<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:10pm<b>toma1945</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 6:29am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 4:49am<b>BoredomIsReal</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 3:45am<b>noik01</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 5:35pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 11:49am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 6:22am<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 11:06pm<b>YouHaveANiceButt</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:18am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 2:16am

michaelaranda's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of michaelaranda's badges

michaelaranda's favorite FMLs

Today, as I left the supermarket, I found someone had hit my car in the parking lot. There was a note tucked under the wipers. Insurance details? Nope. It just said "Sorry dude. I fucked up. Good luck with the car." Great. FML

#21330094
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28338) - you deserved it (1787)

On 01/03/2015 at 4:16pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

#21327839
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23422) - you deserved it (42567)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm - kids - by skanula414 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my boyfriend jokingly said that if I didn't pass my exam, he wouldn't have sex with me for a month. I failed it, and now he thinks I did it on purpose. FML

#21319715
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31490) - you deserved it (4618)

On 12/18/2014 at 12:59pm - love - by peteto818 (woman) - Bulgaria (Pernik)

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML

#21318416
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35299) - you deserved it (6539)

On 12/16/2014 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Extravirgin (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, my 5-year-old daughter was asked by her teacher to write a letter to each member of her family to read during the holidays. Her letter to me said, "Dear mommy, come on. You could have done better than dad." FML

#21318238
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31711) - you deserved it (3671)

On 12/15/2014 at 10:38pm - kids - by Lisa - United States (Missouri)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32752) - you deserved it (2536)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I took out my old hairdryer and turned it on. I then gave my roommate a show as I ran out of the bathroom, naked and screaming, after a spider was blasted out of the hairdryer and directly at my face. FML

#21316166
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32095) - you deserved it (4047)

On 12/12/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by lateralligator - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was having sex when a cigarette craving came on. I don't know what's worse, the fact I asked for a cigarette break in the middle of sex or I last that long. FML

#21315600
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23055) - you deserved it (11085)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by cigarettes - United States

Today, my husband sent me a link to an article titled "5 ways you are unknowingly destroying your husband and killing your marriage." FML

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42891) - you deserved it (3036)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41507) - you deserved it (3791)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I left my desk to go to the bathroom. I arrived back at my desk to a large package of SlimQuick packets. Guess my coworkers think I need to lose weight. FML

#21291592
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27794) - you deserved it (3017)

On 11/03/2014 at 10:38pm - work - by blondieforlife - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was dressed as a single girl. I wore pajama pants, hoodie with no bra, and carried a plate of pizza around. But it wasn't my costume, I just had nowhere to go for Halloween. FML

#21289481
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32318) - you deserved it (4470)

On 11/01/2014 at 1:59am - misc - by 4evalone (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friend thought she would "save me some time" by spoiling Game of Thrones. FML

#21288916
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28269) - you deserved it (3706)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32769) - you deserved it (4576)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



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