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michaelaranda

Offline (13 hours ago) | Search for a member

michaelaranda

45Fucked!

  • Town/Country : San Francisco, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 2 August 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3235
  • Number of comments : 199
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 34 posted

About michaelaranda : Im Brian and im from the bay area. Message me if you want to.

Also, if i landed on your profile, i pressed the "fucks" button, regardless of who you are.

michaelaranda's page activity

Visits<b>BoredomIsReal</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:51am<b>secondgradesucks</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 4:48pm<b>dmo4</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 1:32pm<b>MangoLoco</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 8:49am<b>dinosarefriends</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 3:20pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 6:49am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 7:04am<b>jarlballin</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 7:19am<b>GhastlyLeek</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 9:41am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 7:21am<b>mimiminx</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 5:19am<b>scarlett3diaz</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 1:44am<b>keiNan</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 1:42am<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 5:47am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 3:23am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 9:29pm<b>yoshi061</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 1:08am<b>vriskahs8</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 1:05pm

Fucked!<b>dinosarefriends</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 9:20pm<b>keiNan</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 7:42am<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 6:33pm<b>yoshi061</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 7:08am<b>vriskahs8</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 6:09pm<b>kkkiiitttyyy</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 5:44pm<b>twister45</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 5:09am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 7:22pm<b>Sansa</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 10:40pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 7:23pm<b>blondbombshell13</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 8:07pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 3:05pm<b>dmo4</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 9:12pm<b>SquidgyOmAm</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 6:05am<b>AQueenOfDeath</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:55am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:14am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 3:36am<b>damnitstrue</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 8:33am

michaelaranda's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of michaelaranda's badges

michaelaranda's favorite FMLs

Today, I twisted my knee while cutting firewood with my grandpa. The pain was so crippling, I fell over screaming. His response? "Quit your bitching, I had my kneecaps blown off in Vietnam. They had to stitch 'em back on." He's never been to Vietnam, or even out of the country. FML

#21518868
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24182) - you deserved it (1969)

On 01/24/2016 at 12:10pm - health - by fuckoffgramps (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out my family refers to my room as "the virgin cave". FML

#21518755
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21537) - you deserved it (2570)

On 01/24/2016 at 12:40am - misc - by Dexter_39476 (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I found out that the huge project I've been working on for the past week is actually a group project. Everyone in my group knew. They were just letting me do the entire thing by myself because I'm "smart". FML

#21517916
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20833) - you deserved it (2414)

On 01/21/2016 at 7:02pm - work - by AkiAnime - United States (California)

Today, I was at school deleting documents I no longer needed on my school account. After clicking empty trash can, I saw a final paper on political science deleted. I'm not in political science, and I wasn't deleting files on my account. FML

#21517390
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17530) - you deserved it (9637)

On 01/20/2016 at 2:20pm - misc - by Jennifer (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

#21517322
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19587) - you deserved it (3169)

On 01/20/2016 at 9:27am - kids - by lambeaster (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I found out that the only reason I'm alive is because my dad beat the living shit out of my mom to stop her getting an abortion. FML

#21516125
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25006) - you deserved it (1522)

On 01/17/2016 at 2:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, on my college visit, I met a perfect girl for me, sweet, gorgeous, on the same career path. I remember everything we talked about, where she is from, what sport she plays, and her recent internship. But when I went to look her up online, I couldn't remember one thing, her name. FML

#21516058
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22388) - you deserved it (5055)

On 01/16/2016 at 10:28pm - love - by Roll Tide of Tears - United States

Today, I was out grocery shopping when some pervert decided to slap my ass as they walked by. As I turned around to confront them, I saw that the culprit was a 7 or 8-year-old boy. I was so shocked, speechless and angry that I couldn't even decide how to handle the situation. FML

#21515486
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21807) - you deserved it (2190)

On 01/15/2016 at 5:56am - kids - by DatAss (woman) -

Today, I was going to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. He couldn't get hard and pouted about it for nearly two hours. When I went to comfort him, he said "Man, I hope I'm not gay." FML

#21515416
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23247) - you deserved it (1953)

On 01/14/2016 at 11:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend actually slept with one of the celebrities on her "5 celebrities we're allowed to sleep with" list. FML

#21515102
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27409) - you deserved it (12984)

On 01/14/2016 at 7:51am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML

#21514734
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22520) - you deserved it (5907)

On 01/13/2016 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by ShouldveStayedAVirgin - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was walking across a bridge, a prepubescent middle schooler grabbed my phone from my hand and threw it into the water. His friend filmed it, high-fived him, and they both ran off. I got that phone less than a week ago. FML

#21514472
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22893) - you deserved it (1528)

On 01/12/2016 at 8:18pm - misc - by ripmyphone - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mom informed me she got married two weeks ago. Hard to congratulate her when this is her eighth husband. FML

#21514447
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20643) - you deserved it (1314)

On 01/12/2016 at 7:16pm - love - by TabbyCat87 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I finished reading a manga series on a website I go on all the time. As I read the last page I got a huge celebratory message from the website saying I was the first one to read every manga on their site. The website opened in 2011 and has over 30,000 manga. My God, I need a social life. FML

#21514123
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21536) - you deserved it (6198)

On 01/11/2016 at 9:47pm - misc - by Lesser spotted female gaming nerd (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML



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