Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

metalmusic

Search for a member

metalmusic

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1654
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

metalmusic's page activity

Visits<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 5:25pm<b>alexloz_au</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 12:02am<b>Jenmic</b> - the 01/13/2011 at 4:55am<b>Sichumor</b> - the 07/06/2010 at 12:24am<b>shaBAMalex</b> - the 05/30/2010 at 8:45pm<b>perdix</b> - the 02/21/2010 at 9:25am

metalmusic's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

metalmusic's favorite FMLs

Today, my best friend thought it would be funny push me off my bike. He thought it was even funnier when the paramedic accidentally dropped me. FML

#4983911
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43172) - you deserved it (2619)

On 09/01/2009 at 8:04pm - health - by Misterhippo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a concert. Knowing these concerts usually include a lot of black lights, I decided to wear a black T-shirt so I wouldn't glow. I was having a good time, but about halfway through I noticed someone pointing to my shoulder. I looked down to see my dandruff glowing. FML

#4826832
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32142) - you deserved it (16043)

On 08/26/2009 at 12:29am - misc - by Raaar (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was walking out of a bar when someone grabbed me by the throat, and slammed me against a wall, saying "Stop fooling around with my wife, because next time - I'll kill you." I'm gay and haven't been with a woman since 1985. FML

#4810431
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60986) - you deserved it (6418)

On 08/25/2009 at 1:09pm - love - by Jeff (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML

#4736198
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49540) - you deserved it (5994)

On 08/22/2009 at 1:46pm - intimacy - by doomed (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went out to eat dinner with my family to celebrate my 18th birthday. I playfully put 3 straws between my knuckles to make myself look like Wolverine. I turned to my 6 year old nephew and ask, "Who am I?" He then replied with, "An idiot." FML

#4699130
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14781) - you deserved it (46113)

On 08/21/2009 at 1:18am - kids - by Mak10 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had my sweet sixteen party. All my best friends came to the microphone to make a little speech. When my boyfriend came to do his, he broke up with me. FML

#4687327
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60614) - you deserved it (5448)

On 08/20/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by 16isntsweet (woman) - United States (California)

Today, was the first day all week I got to sleep in. I woke up this beautiful morning to the sun shining in my window and hundreds of carpenter ants crawling over my sheets and me. FML

#4677872
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41883) - you deserved it (2649)

On 08/20/2009 at 8:45am - misc - by tommy3824 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was playing catch with my 6 year old cousin in the garden, when he demanded a piggy back. Trying to be the good cousin, I did so and he soon shouts "Run! Run!" so I do so. Suddenly he shouts "STOP! My winky's gone pointy". I gave my 6 year old cousin an erection. FML

#4637795
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56490) - you deserved it (4695)

On 08/18/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by Girl - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML

#4619260
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72643) - you deserved it (5798)

On 08/18/2009 at 1:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins. FML

#4539697
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (122136) - you deserved it (6326)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by jellybean_94 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I started a new job as a maid. As I was cleaning the master bedroom's en-suite bathroom, the owners of the house came in and started making love. I was too scared to admit I was there, but after there was silence for a few minutes I thought it might be safe to leave. It wasn't. FML

#4472401
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50567) - you deserved it (6971)

On 08/12/2009 at 10:25am - misc - by maidmyday (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, at the breakfast table my mum asked me what I thought about the plumber who came to our place a couple of weeks ago. I told her that I thought he was really cute and how hard I tried to flirt with him, she nodded and told me that he is her new boyfriend and might move in with us soon. FML

#4468950
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44778) - you deserved it (5365)

On 08/12/2009 at 3:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my 6 ft snake got loose. I found it. It was in my neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit. FML

#4299524
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19709) - you deserved it (40819)

On 08/05/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend was reading me a love poem he wrote for me. It was beautiful, and going really well until he read the last line, which had a girl's name in it. It wasn't my name. My boyfriend said "shit, wrong girl", and dug through his bag for a different poem. FML

#4277493
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57979) - you deserved it (4171)

On 08/04/2009 at 7:27am - love - by jemma (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I quit my job after two years. Now I have my crazy boss sitting out in front of my house, telling me she wants to work things out. She has been there all day. FML

#4255105
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44862) - you deserved it (3587)

On 08/03/2009 at 1:16pm - work - by Azcrazy (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: