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mercury42

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mercury42
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  • Number of visits : 384
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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mercury42's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

#6433881
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31926) - you deserved it (2161)

On 11/24/2009 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML

#5586348
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34580) - you deserved it (4045)

On 10/01/2009 at 4:07pm - misc - by dumbass (man) - United States (Pennsylvania) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML

#5276065
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54561) - you deserved it (3023)

On 09/15/2009 at 5:14pm - intimacy - by benander (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I was frantically searching for my cell phone. He was curious as to what I was doing so I told him. There was long silence followed by laughter. He could hardly breathe as he told me, "Honey you're on your phone talking to me." FML

#4609824
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9705) - you deserved it (57361)

On 08/17/2009 at 8:16pm - misc - by hunnydoll (woman) - United States (California)



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