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mentallizzard

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mentallizzard
  • Town/Country : Columbus, United states of america
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 17 July 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 280
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About mentallizzard : meh

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mentallizzard's favorite FMLs

Today, I retook my ACT. I have been fighting a cold all week and have been very sneezy lately. Midway through the test, I got the urge to sneeze. Since it was very quiet and I didn't want to disturb the peace, I tried to hold my sneeze in. I ended up letting out a huge fart instead. FML

#5672838
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31496) - you deserved it (8638)

On 10/05/2009 at 10:21pm - misc - by Sneezy123 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while giving a lecture about gases to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud fart while they took some notes. I came back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wireless mic on. FML

#5033555
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13171) - you deserved it (40046)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:30am - work - by DrGas (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while giving a lecture about gases to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud fart while they took some notes. I came back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wireless mic on. FML

#5033555
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13171) - you deserved it (40046)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:30am - work - by DrGas (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was very sick and kept throwing up. I took a shower after every time I threw up. While in the shower after I threw up, I had to throw up again, so I got out and ran to the toilet. I slipped on the tile, broke my nose on the floor, and then threw up. FML

#4543723
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49206) - you deserved it (9426)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:51am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was in the car for 8 hours driving home from North Carolina with my family. We brought my dog along and I was petting her for most of the ride. I thought she fell asleep, so I continued to play with her. She never woke up. I played with a dead dog for almost an hour and a half. FML

#4464455
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55220) - you deserved it (3658)

On 08/12/2009 at 12:13am - animals - by jennabean (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home about two hours early from a friend's party. After I walked in and upstairs, I quickly and quietly left and went back to the party. I guess my parents decided to have a little party as well. It's called a threesome with my neighbor. They still don't know that I know. FML

#3932476
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58260) - you deserved it (3534)

On 07/21/2009 at 3:47pm - intimacy - by emkatch (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was watching TV with a cup of coffee. My mum asked if I wanted a Mars bar. I said that would be great and she threw one at me, catching me off guard. The Mars bar went straight into my coffee, spilling it over my bare legs. I now have a scald mark on my penis. FML

#2114829
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42591) - you deserved it (6425)

On 05/20/2009 at 3:53pm - misc - by Benji (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28760) - you deserved it (133766)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28760) - you deserved it (133766)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was in a bathroom stall peeing. Shortly after, I heard a couple enter the bathroom, both extremely drunk. They then had sex standing up against the stall I was in, blocking my only exit. I had to sit, wait, and listen as both parties finished. FML

#1964368
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30451) - you deserved it (3121)

On 05/15/2009 at 2:49pm - intimacy - by dammitall (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML

#1353453
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55430) - you deserved it (11663)

On 04/26/2009 at 12:21pm - misc - by fuckMYlife94321 (man) - United States (Connecticut)



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