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mentallizzard

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mentallizzard

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mentallizzardmentallizzard
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 17 July 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 942
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About mentallizzard : meh

mentallizzard's page activity

Visits<b>CurtisGirl</b> - 9 hours ago<b>Tommiix</b> - 18 hours ago<b>singer0421</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 4:19pm<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 6:16am<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 10:48pm<b>maiiru</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 8:42pm<b>expertsmilee</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 4:21pm<b>WeskerxChris</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 4:19pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 2:29pm<b>Rozza17</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 8:47pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 8:59am<b>jack_jill05</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 7:57am<b>tagallopes</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 11:12pm<b>buckydargon</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 1:12pm<b>Ausdank</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:45pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 12:39pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 11:19am<b>SrgntSprnkls77</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 4:50pm

Liked!<b>CurtisGirl</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 3:00pm

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mentallizzard's favorite FMLs

Today, my three year old sister asked me to go to the amusement park with her. Since I was late for work, I politely refused and said we'd go tomorrow. She punched me in the nuts so hard that I could barely walk. FML

#17438082
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27719) - you deserved it (5068)

On 08/11/2011 at 4:45am - kids - by IRum (man) - Russian Federation

Today, my boss became very angry over her own mistake on a spreadsheet. She lashed out by throwing a can of SpaghettiOs at my head. FML

#17434039
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27555) - you deserved it (2230)

On 08/10/2011 at 10:21pm - work - by Liz - United States

Today, my boyfriend's mother walked in on us having sex. He started crying and ran into the bathroom where my clothes were located, leaving me to deal with his mother. Naked. FML

#17313020
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39785) - you deserved it (7532)

On 07/30/2011 at 8:45pm - intimacy - by cutiekenz21 - United States (Oregon)

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37635) - you deserved it (9720)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, in an amphitheater, someone hit the back of my head. As I turned around, the guy apologized and said he mistook me for his friend. I changed seats, and after a while, I got hit a second time. He was wrong again. FML

#17159323
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29116) - you deserved it (3378)

On 07/18/2011 at 3:09am - misc - by fthislyfe (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I began to walk across the street when I saw a very familiar old lady struggle across it. I walked over to help her, and only after she had blown her rape whistle and socked me in the nuts did she realize I was her grandson. FML

#16919201
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39641) - you deserved it (3204)

On 06/30/2011 at 4:18am - misc - by John - United States

Today, I was auditioning for a talent show. I asked my girlfriend if I could sing to her before I went. She said sure. Thirty seconds in, she got up and mumbled, "You're only going to embarrass yourself." FML

#16128552
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22142) - you deserved it (13950)

On 05/11/2011 at 11:19am - misc - by NotChadKrouger -

Today, my girlfriend chose the most expensive restaurant in town, then spent the entire time facebooking, texting, and playing games on her phone while I dined in silence. This is the second time we've been out this week. She didn't even eat her food. I didn't even get a thank you. FML

#15749672
418 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53465) - you deserved it (13569)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:27am - love - by BrokeAndPsst (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a friend and I saw some deer outside my car. Since we were both leaving for college the next day we wanted to do something memorable so we decided to chase the deer. Turns out the deer wanted to chase us too. We ran for over five minutes screaming. FML

#14670842
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7150) - you deserved it (47894)

On 01/22/2011 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

#14610611
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14417) - you deserved it (36837) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

#14610611
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14417) - you deserved it (36837) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't attend her dog's funeral, and was therefore an insensitive bastard. I couldn't attend because my mum has cancer and I was driving her to a hospital appointment. FML

#14263192
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48507) - you deserved it (3022)

On 12/19/2010 at 7:31pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I got married. When my father gave me away, in front of hundreds of people, to my groom, he said, "She's your problem now." FML

#14091137
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (7997)

On 12/05/2010 at 1:25am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

#13937569
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33259) - you deserved it (7588)

On 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by painfulintercourse - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend compared my orgasm to that of a beached sea turtle. He demonstrated what he meant in front of all our friends. FML

#13934801
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27146) - you deserved it (3644)

On 11/22/2010 at 7:29am - intimacy - by shopper242 - France



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