Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

memilyn0105

Search for a member

memilyn0105

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 January 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 220
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About memilyn0105 : Simply me :-)

memilyn0105's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

memilyn0105's favorite FMLs

Today, I used a porta-potty. After I came out, my mom came out of one and said "I really wish I could wash my hands." I explained that I used the little soap bar that was on the side of the toilet in mine. She told me that was a urinal and the soap bar was a disinfectant bar. FML

#2903638
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14906) - you deserved it (56252)

On 06/15/2009 at 2:08am - misc - by hockeyfanaticx87 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I witnessed a horrible car accident and was interviewed by the local news. During the interview I said, "It was terrible. It was like watching a silent movie... but there was sound!" The interview has been aired 6 times. FML

#2612293
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30081) - you deserved it (74825)

On 06/04/2009 at 9:07pm - misc - by LadyChristina25 - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML

#2406787
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20761) - you deserved it (44988)

On 05/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by LALALALA (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

#2275729
734 comments

I agree, your life sucks (276521) - you deserved it (146525)

On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I confronted my fiancé and told him I knew his 'little secret'. I had suspected that he had been ruining his wedding diet by eating pizza at the office. He replied that the affair with his secretary had only been going on for a couple of months. FML

#2251338
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74249) - you deserved it (7316)

On 05/24/2009 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (430904) - you deserved it (59887)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, we watched a movie in French class. I went on a French exchange last year, so I wanted to sound all impressive and cultured for my crush who is in the same class. I said that it was my favorite movie and I couldn't wait to watch it with everyone. The movie turned out to be about incest. FML

#1648033
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8274) - you deserved it (76658)

On 05/04/2009 at 10:41pm - misc - by daddyslittlegirl250 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while at the bakeshop, I got bored waiting in line so I decided to sit on the glass case protecting cupcakes. Turns out there was no glass. I had to pay $50 to cover all the mess and had to walk out of the bakeshop with icing all over my butt. FML

#1618603
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11054) - you deserved it (71895)

On 05/04/2009 at 3:34am - misc - by kandi (woman) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML

#913985
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63016) - you deserved it (19813)

On 04/11/2009 at 11:47am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was going through my old MSN conversations. I then realized that when I first got MSN, I didn't know that messages you sent after people went offline would be delivered to them when they signed in. I used to type 'I love you' to my crush after every time he went offline. FML

#665920
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31807) - you deserved it (83970)

On 03/28/2009 at 6:13pm - love - by WeezysBaby (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML

#621353
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61916) - you deserved it (32006)

On 03/26/2009 at 1:11pm - love - by johnfrank (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friends and me had a little water balloon fight and somehow it led to throwing water balloons at cars. We all decided to hit a car all at once, after one came by we all hit it. The car stopped and started flashing bright blue lights. We ended up hitting an off-duty police car. FML

#616637
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10879) - you deserved it (109764)

On 03/26/2009 at 1:20am - misc - by AzNFoo (man) - United States (California)

Today, as I was bagging groceries, I looked down to see a 6-year-old urinating on my shoes and the floor next to me. I told his mother that he should take her kid to the restroom, only to be told to "mind my own goddamn business." I was later fired for arguing with the customer. FML

#256127
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (139862) - you deserved it (6377)

On 03/09/2009 at 10:00pm - work - by unemployed (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I decided to lighten my hair. I applied the dye and waited 20 minutes. When I went to wash the dye out, the water wouldn't turn on. After my head started to burn, I called the landlord in a panic. Turns out there was a water main break and the entire city block doesn't have water. FML

#250942
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75258) - you deserved it (5353)

On 03/09/2009 at 12:23pm - misc - by NowABlonde (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a guy who I've been on five dates with called me for the first time in 2 weeks. The first thing I said was, "Don't expect me to go out with you again after going AWOL on me." Then he told me his mom died. FML

#198130
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15339) - you deserved it (64684)

On 03/03/2009 at 6:08pm - love - by ouch (woman) - United States (Louisiana)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: