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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4990
  • Number of comments : 153
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About melody309 : Hi! I'm just a college student trying to find her way in the world without drowning in debt. My favorite things in the world are baking, Harry Potter, Pokémon, music, All Time Low, psychology, my cat, my family, and my boyfriend. Sometimes I like to dance around my room like I'm 14 and pretend my hair brush is a microphone, and I'm not ashamed.

melody309's page activity

Visits<b>blackfire20</b> - yesterday at 10:37am<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 1:30pm<b>MasterTron</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 7:43pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 6:28am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 4:45pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 8:16am<b>khrystwiztidkid</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 5:59pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 3:47pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 3:09pm<b>thelove1lost</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 10:28pm<b>say_what2032</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 7:14am<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 9:11am<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 9:20am<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 8:09am<b>fiftycarrots</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 11:04pm<b>Dave_Davington</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 5:14am<b>Xx_DEXIJOKER_xX</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 10:27pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 3:22pm

Fucked!<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 7:30pm<b>MasterTron</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 1:43am<b>khoov19</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 2:46pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 9:08am<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 3:20pm<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 2:09pm<b>fiftycarrots</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 5:04am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 7:41pm<b>columbusthecat</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:22am<b>bdsmslave</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 11:28pm<b>Xx_ISeeStara_xD</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 2:06am<b>Chickenlips21</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 7:35pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 2:42am<b>Soninuva</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 4:18am<b>hahahehehe</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 11:31pm<b>Christine_Junmin</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 12:51pm<b>shitcreeksurvr</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 7:53pm<b>DestinyNiya</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 9:29am

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melody309's favorite FMLs

Today, my house was broken into. After we called the police, my dad started calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop. FML

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML


I agree, your life sucks (63202) - you deserved it (5821)

On 08/10/2013 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I actually had to explain to two of my friends that neither Alaska nor Nebraska are in Canada. I think I need new friends. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43934) - you deserved it (5155)

On 08/08/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by ROBERT (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48152) - you deserved it (9401)

On 08/06/2013 at 2:19am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the kids I was babysitting somehow found a pair of my underwear. They asked if they could use them to go parachuting. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41315) - you deserved it (6730)

On 08/04/2013 at 1:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML


I agree, your life sucks (60389) - you deserved it (5837)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by um... what the fuck, miss? (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my family and I went to feed carrots to the giraffes at the zoo. After I finished my first cup of carrots, I turned back to get some more. Suddenly, I was jerked back and a chunk of my hair was ripped out. The giraffe mistook the orange barrette in my hair for a carrot. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47496) - you deserved it (10112)

On 07/29/2013 at 4:19am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49348) - you deserved it (4157)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:28am - animals - by mishyb (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out why we've had to replace 3 washing machines this year. My sister thinks that "huge capacity" means "load the washing machine until no more clothes will fit." It blows the motor every time. She's 31. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50272) - you deserved it (4002)

On 07/27/2013 at 5:26am - misc - by kilamo80 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my grandma walked into my house drunk. She was mumbling something about her being a badass because she beat someone with a pool stick at a bar. She's 68 years old. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41099) - you deserved it (3976)

On 07/26/2013 at 2:10am - misc - by dareyale (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my husband managed to set fire to half of our garden setting up mosquito repellents. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39187) - you deserved it (3203)

On 07/25/2013 at 12:10am - misc - by how (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, one of my bosses said, "You're going to take this as an insult, but it's not. At a certain age, women are supposed to cut their hair short." I have long hair. My bosses have all of the social skills of the guys from Big Bang Theory. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39840) - you deserved it (3566)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:23am - work - by Irreverend (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to wake my mom up. While she was naked. On the toilet. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend I had diabetes. He won't talk to me anymore because he thinks I'll infect him with it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50470) - you deserved it (3909)

On 07/21/2013 at 10:35pm - love - by sabrinatarmine_ - United States (California)

Today, while filling out paperwork at the dermatologist, it asked what color I would use to describe my skin tone. When the nurse saw I chose fair, she mumbled "Ghost is more like it." I have a severe sun allergy. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49348) - you deserved it (4068)

On 07/21/2013 at 11:03am - misc - by Ghostly (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

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