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melkymac101

Offline (the 02/28/2015 at 7:52pm) | Search for a member

melkymac101

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 December 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 1738
  • Number of comments : 127
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About melkymac101 : Enjoy reading about everyone elses problems. Haha. For real though I feel bad for u guys. I mean like the crap you guys go through is just ridiculous. But anyway I'm in love with Josh Hutcherson. We're getting married soon

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melkymac101's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

#20889434
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51198) - you deserved it (34394)

On 09/20/2013 at 9:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML

#20887524
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51210) - you deserved it (4979)

On 09/19/2013 at 6:30am - kids - by monkey (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, as I started my car, I heard the most horrific sounds coming from the engine. When I lifted the hood I realized I'd found my son's cat. FML

Today, one of my online friends told me he's bought a plane ticket, so he can come visit me. I've told him multiple times before that I'm uncomfortable with this idea, but he keeps telling me to stop joking, and reminding me that he'll have no other place to stay. FML

Today, I went to my first class of the year. The first thing the teacher said was, "I hate this f*cking school." FML

#20867651
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34448) - you deserved it (2664)

On 09/04/2013 at 4:39pm - misc - by swana99 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML

#20859311
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54224) - you deserved it (6073)

On 08/29/2013 at 2:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out yet another of my guy friends liked me. I posted that I just wanted a guy friend that had absolutely no romantic feelings for me. My crush volunteered. FML

#20842536
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31534) - you deserved it (61762)

On 08/18/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by fail - United States

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22847) - you deserved it (44215)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70220) - you deserved it (9278)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70220) - you deserved it (9278)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML

#20818899
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55807) - you deserved it (8328)

On 08/03/2013 at 4:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, my girlfriend kicked me out for bringing up the idea of her maybe giving me a blowjob someday. According to her, it's "demeaning" and "sick". She doesn't seem to have a problem always making me go down on her for ages as a condition for having sex with me, though. FML

#20754518
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56630) - you deserved it (9091)

On 06/29/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by patriarchal apparently (man) - Saint Lucia

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. We'd been talking about the move where you pick a girl up and kiss, and how romantic that would be, so we decided to try it. When he picked me up, my head slammed against his ceiling fan. FML

Today, I drove 2 hours to my sister's wedding, only to find out my invitation was sent to me by mistake. She had me kicked out. FML

#20712353
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57253) - you deserved it (4487)

On 06/07/2013 at 8:16pm - misc - by hopeyoushityourintestinesout (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68222) - you deserved it (19325)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)



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