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melissaa

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melissaa

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 26 November 1989 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2020
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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melissaa's page activity

Visits<b>Gooberglop</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 11:47am<b>jubejube239</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 12:00pm<b>PotterHead_DH</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 5:42pm<b>dboles12</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 11:38pm<b>rob02</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 10:50pm<b>lololololol_Guy</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 11:45pm<b>chadwj</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 7:55pm<b>purplerain229</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 7:55am<b>shinn</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 2:13am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:41pm<b>tiggie02</b> - the 06/13/2009 at 10:19am<b>depinaariana</b> - the 06/10/2009 at 10:52pm<b>tiger01</b> - the 06/10/2009 at 10:44pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 06/10/2009 at 9:47pm<b>jmud</b> - the 06/10/2009 at 8:28pm<b>jokerssmile</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 10:03pm<b>ha</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 3:57pm<b>assman266</b> - the 05/02/2009 at 10:39pm

melissaa's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

melissaa's favorite FMLs

Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML

#1918683
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58306) - you deserved it (6930)

On 05/13/2009 at 9:45pm - kids - by chelserusera (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad. I decided to speed to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML

#1692972
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55492) - you deserved it (11144)

On 05/06/2009 at 3:11pm - misc - by jojo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

#1690188
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98920) - you deserved it (22716)

On 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Familyskank (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone." in a seductive tone. FML

#1681747
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62452) - you deserved it (7218)

On 05/06/2009 at 12:13am - love - by Jinthebar (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML

#1631197
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25774) - you deserved it (69892)

On 05/04/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML

#1628197
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25924) - you deserved it (67671)

On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

#796416
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74629) - you deserved it (40975)

On 04/04/2009 at 4:04am - intimacy - by showerstupid (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a really cute guy sat across from me on the bus. He smiled at me, then tensed his muscles and lifted a heavy bag with one arm. Thinking he was trying to act "macho" to impress me, I rolled my eyes and threw him an annoyed/disgusted look. When he got off, I realized he only had one arm. FML

#795455
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8916) - you deserved it (75373)

On 04/04/2009 at 2:05am - misc - by OrangeTree12 - Canada (British Columbia)



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