meli1195

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meli1195

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meli1195meli1195
  • Town/Country : Livermore, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 January 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17184
  • Number of comments : 282
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About meli1195 : I didn't wake up like this

meli1195's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 2:14pm<b>thingslikethat</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 1:31pm<b>slappygecko</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 4:11pm<b>lifeofpie25</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 12:07am<b>Mons</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 1:27pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 1:45am<b>twitch5517</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 6:21am<b>tjg8885</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 3:38am<b>DeadxManxWalking</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 5:42pm<b>ItsJuan</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 10:39pm<b>Burkiie45</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 2:57pm<b>RedDevilOut</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 9:51am<b>Stumpling_</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 11:20pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 9:49am<b>frankmz</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 7:00am<b>bigwell</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 6:33am<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 1:46am<b>Swizzles</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 1:26am

Fucked!<b>bigwell</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 12:33pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 5:12pm<b>alphasmartass93</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 11:54pm<b>EmoFluffy</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 5:04am<b>martin8337</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 10:33am<b>lifeofpie25</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 2:30pm<b>NAH2000</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 5:06pm<b>Tenker</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 3:32am<b>csjc</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 9:19pm<b>russfml</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 1:36am<b>hasooon</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:27pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 9:54pm<b>Kamorka</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 5:49pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 9:09pm<b>jasonbarnes20</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 12:03pm<b>EnigmaticSoul</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 2:10am<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 4:09am<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 4:34pm

meli1195's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of meli1195's badges

meli1195's favorite FMLs

Today, I bleached my upper lip hair so it wouldn't be visible anymore. At school, for the first time, the guy I like came over to talk to me after class. Just as I thought he was about to ask me out, he told me how weird my "gold moustache" looks. FML

Today, in an attempt to spice things up a bit, my boyfriend and I discovered he takes it in the butt better than I do. FML

by anal-retentive / 06/23/2016 at 4:00pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML

by atleasthelistened / 03/09/2016 at 3:04am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I let my estranged husband move back in with my son and me. Later, his pregnant and underage girlfriend knocked on my door, crying about how her mom kicked her out. I'm such a pushover, they're in my bed and I'm on the couch. FML

by ishyboo / 02/27/2016 at 5:59pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, two aggressive police officers appeared at my door informing me that a complaint was filed about my 18 year-old son having "inappropriate relations" with a 16 year-old. We live in England. I had to Google the law to prove to them this was legal. FML

by Confuseddad / 02/16/2016 at 5:17pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, my 13 year-old son had a seizure in the middle of his history class. We were at the hospital for three hours and several expensive tests later he informed me he faked the seizure so he could get out of a group presentation. He was so proud that he was such a good actor. FML

by EllieS9311 / 02/16/2016 at 8:16am / United States (Alabama) / Kids

Today, the play I was directing opened. The curtain opened, and my lead actor and actress weren't prepared. I could tell from the looks on their faces as the whole audience saw him balls deep in her, doggy style, on stage. FML

by headinabag33 / 02/14/2016 at 8:57pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, barely 2 hours into a 5 hour car ride home, my mom accidentally let slip that she's been cheating on my dad. I had to sit with the bitch in a diner for ages while my dad bawled his eyes out alone in the car. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2016 at 1:11am / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with the guy I like. He couldn't get it up and awkwardly tried to stick his limp penis in. FML

by myusofwe / 02/05/2016 at 8:33pm / Puerto Rico / Intimacy

Today, I shared with my doctor that I still feel uncomfortable with my medication. She expressed surprise, saying, "Really? By now I would've thought it'd be routine." Sorry, no. In three months, I have not gotten used to sticking a syringe up my butt and injecting my rectum full of medicated foam. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2016 at 9:22pm / United States (Maryland) / Health

Today, I accidentally walked in on my sister shaving, naked. I don't know what's worse, the fact I've now seen her nude, or that she looks ten times better than any girl I've ever slept with. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2016 at 4:33am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally walked in on my sister shaving, naked. I don't know what's worse, the fact I've now seen her nude, or that she looks ten times better than any girl I've ever slept with. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2016 at 4:33am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend lost one of her rings. I found this out as I overheard her gushing to her friend about how I must have borrowed it to find out what her ring size is. I have zero interest whatsoever in the sick and utterly immoral institution of marriage. FML

by ALL PRAISE TO THE NIGHT MOTHER / 01/29/2016 at 4:19pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, after weeks of watching Michael Jackson videos non-stop, my boyfriend learned how to moonwalk. Now he does it literally everywhere. I can't even cross the street without him moonwalking behind me. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 7:24pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son became convinced that his father cheated and we put the fertilized egg inside me to cover the whole thing up. He won't stop calling me "host mother". FML

by anonymous / 01/25/2016 at 9:09am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids