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Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36525) - you totally deserved it (3801)
On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, as a joke, my friends and I decided to put me in a dress and makeup, to creep out a friend. I'm a guy. I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that I so willingly volunteered to wear the dress and the makeup, or the fact that I thought it was comfy and made me look slim. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7235) - you totally deserved it (33032)
On 08/09/2009 at 3:31am - misc - by twitch01 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I found out that when you chase a couple of squirrels off your porch for irritating your dogs, sometimes they chase you back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23904) - you totally deserved it (9084)
On 08/09/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23052) - you totally deserved it (58745)
On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - misc - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops, looks directly at me, and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN!" and proceeds to flip me over, grab his clothes, and run out of my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66384) - you totally deserved it (8251)
On 04/30/2009 at 8:15am - intimacy - by soooyeah (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up!". FML
I agree, your life sucks (45679) - you totally deserved it (10713)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)
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