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Today, the city shut off the water at my house because my roommate thought that the water bills he had been hoarding were "suggestions." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23090) - you deserved it (2399)
On 11/02/2009 at 12:30pm - money - by parched (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I saw an article that Burger King is selling a whopper with seven patties in celebration of the Windows Seven release. Upon reading this, I immediately got an extremely forceful erection. I think this is a sign to stop putting off that diet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9817) - you deserved it (6433)
On 10/26/2009 at 12:25am - intimacy - by Brian (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was playing Farmville all day, and I was really into the game. I was getting phone calls all day, but I kept ignoring them cause I was making so much Farm Money. Come to find out it was my son's school. He fell off the jungle gym and broke his arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4902) - you deserved it (91217)
On 10/24/2009 at 3:25am - kids - by stewhart (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I learned that being a twin really isn't that cool. After laughing at my twin brother for getting a speeding ticket he turns to me and says "It's not mine." Confused, I look at the ticket and see my name. He used my license. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36125) - you deserved it (2981)
On 10/20/2009 at 3:03pm - misc - by Twinner (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I played with a boomerang my first time. I didn't believe that when you threw it, it comes right back to you. It flew back all right. And broke my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8322) - you deserved it (30391)
On 09/24/2009 at 5:39pm - misc - by BOOMerang (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that the reason I hadn't gotten pregnant yet was because my husband had a vasectomy after the birth of his son. He even had the nerve to continously tell me, "it'll happen soon, baby" and let me believe we were trying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46541) - you deserved it (2959)
On 09/15/2009 at 2:18pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I got shoved into a wall and pickpocketed. I was already in a bad mood from being dumped, so I chased the guy, tackled him so hard he was knocked out. As I retrieved my things, the police arrested me and apparently the robber was the cop's son, and didn't believe my statement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52233) - you deserved it (2206)
On 09/04/2009 at 10:14am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, while emailing my very young, attractive teacher to ask a question, my hand slipped. Too bad you can't unsend emails that say "Can we meet after school some time? I have some thongs I'd like to discuss with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30826) - you deserved it (8065)
On 08/31/2009 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29116) - you deserved it (8175)
On 08/22/2009 at 5:07am - health - by Buggga (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29116) - you deserved it (8175)
On 08/22/2009 at 5:07am - health - by Buggga (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. When I asked her why she did, she said that the psychic that she was texting (one of those 44644 numbers) said we have a 2% compatibility rating. How does that explain 4 years of happy dating? FML
I agree, your life sucks (43603) - you deserved it (3013)
On 08/20/2009 at 1:50pm - love - by ihatemylife (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my little sister thought it'd be cool to pierce my nose while I was asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40234) - you deserved it (2658)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:17am - misc - by NoseInPain (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I decided I need help, so I confessed to my mother that I'm bulimic. After she looked it up online she started screaming at me for "Wasting food that I'm not paying for." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41697) - you deserved it (9245)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:43pm - health - by Rainbow92 (woman) - Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya)
Today, my grandma went to get birthday gifts for my twin sister and me. She returned with 2 shirts that read "I see you've met the twins" in big letters across the chest. She gave them to us and said, "Isn't this cute? 'cause you're twins!" I then had to explain to her what the shirt was actually referring to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39461) - you deserved it (2782)
On 08/14/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by twingirl (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Today, my grandma went to get birthday gifts for my twin sister and me. She returned with 2 shirts that read "I see you've met the twins" in big letters across the chest. She gave them to us and said, "Isn't this cute? 'cause you're twins!" I then had to explain to her what the shirt was actually referring to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39461) - you deserved it (2782)
On 08/14/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by twingirl (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Friday 24 May 2013
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