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melcat

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 6 May 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1648
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About melcat : If you're reading this, congratulations.

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melcat's page activity

Visits<b>MsRenoldsEA</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 12:20am<b>bradix1186</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 4:58pm<b>crazyhomelessman</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 12:06am<b>scfann11</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 1:21am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 6:29am<b>sadlarry</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 12:03pm<b>jerzjay</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 5:57pm<b>ayazdgrade</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 3:37pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 11:51pm<b>Juneyah1017</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 12:31pm<b>Moota</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 11:12pm<b>CH1CKEN_FL1PPEN</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 4:50am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 3:08pm<b>mybarra6</b> - the 05/11/2013 at 10:14pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 9:25pm<b>jeffandjeff</b> - the 04/23/2013 at 8:19pm<b>malheartsnutmeg</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 6:14pm<b>lstrawberrycake</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 7:46pm

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melcat's favorite FMLs

Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML

#11389778
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18462) - you deserved it (57640)

On 06/22/2010 at 9:41pm - health - by fartwoman - United States (California)

Today, I was spelling T-R-E-A-T to my fiancé so that the dog wouldn't understand what I was talking about. Turns out, neither could my fiancé. FML

#10853555
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27306) - you deserved it (4911)

On 05/30/2010 at 12:01am - animals - by misTreated (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got dumped because I was on my period. Apparently he was pissed because I have one "like, every single month." FML

Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML

#9134827
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8943) - you deserved it (35365)

On 03/16/2010 at 4:12pm - love - by splitzville (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40800) - you deserved it (8437)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my son pooped in his diaper and managed to somehow take it off without my knowledge. He then sat down on the carpet and imitated a dog with worms, all the way down the hallway, through the living room, and into my bedroom. FML

#8042799
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27827) - you deserved it (3778)

On 02/09/2010 at 3:19am - kids - by matchristityler (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in the line at Chipotle and noticed a very attractive lady in her mid 20's. I deliberately took the table next to her and her friend and happened to overhear what they were talking about. They were both discussing how much diarrhea they were going to have when they got home. FML

#7442500
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7971) - you deserved it (25902)

On 01/19/2010 at 7:08pm - misc - by maximus (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, the guy I've been texting told me he loved me and he couldn't wait to make me his wife, and he couldn't wait for us to have kids and grow old together. I've only known him for 3 days. FML

#7047511
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27874) - you deserved it (4460)

On 12/31/2009 at 12:23am - love - by Anonymous. - United States

Today, I finally told my girlfriend I love her. She corrected my grammar. FML

#6978473
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23339) - you deserved it (8968)

On 12/27/2009 at 7:37pm - love - by ITalkGood - Sent from mobile version

Today, my 25 year old brother ran into my room very excited at 8am. "Wake up! We got a new puppy!" he told me. I was so excited so I jumped out of my warm bed. When I asked him if he was serious he said "No, but we have to go to church, so get dressed." FML

#6937151
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27523) - you deserved it (8464)

On 12/25/2009 at 10:30am - misc - by MessyMal (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother confronted me about my bird's masturbation problem. We spent christmas eve googling "bird masturbating" and watching videos to see if that was actually what my bird was doing. At least he's having a good christmas. FML

#6933145
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23081) - you deserved it (2942)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:25am - animals - by suuuuuupucci (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while driving, we pulled up at a set of traffic lights next to a huge truck with live animals inside. Curious as to exactly what animal, I wound down my window to see if I could hear them, just in time for the truck to take off and cow shit to fly in my face. FML

#6844162
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22455) - you deserved it (10162)

On 12/20/2009 at 9:37am - misc - by kat, ACT - United States

Today, I spent five minutes trying to kill a spider with my mind. FML

#6789867
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8762) - you deserved it (39272)

On 12/17/2009 at 4:58am - animals - by AnRom (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while putting on makeup, I got a face full of bloody scratches instead of an even skin tone. Turns out my makeup sponge was full of bits of glass. My little brother forgot to tell me he shattered a mirror beside my makeup box. FML

#6316849
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32866) - you deserved it (3024)

On 11/15/2009 at 8:46pm - kids - by redisnotmycolor (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML

#6302850
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6959) - you deserved it (67057)

On 11/14/2009 at 4:37pm - animals - by TheMichaelNixon - United States (Tennessee)



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