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Offline (the 11/04/2014 at 2:11pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4296
  • Number of comments : 120
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 44 posted

About megapeyt : I read FML for lack of a better thing to do in my spare time. Lotta comments but have yet to get an FML through the mods (CURSE YOU ALL!!!)

Most of the time I'm more looking for a decent pun I can use at an appropriate time later in my day

Imagine a world; where everything is said via puns...

Now if someone would kindly get the Mods to let me get an FML through, that'd be greaaaat, mmmmmmk?

megapeyt's page activity

Visits<b>ItsUhUnicorn</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 11:24pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 12:43am<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 4:40pm<b>am1717</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 1:01am<b>bloodyhello</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 1:32pm<b>AWildNoeAppeared</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 9:59am<b>fluxnflow</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 12:26pm<b>S13rra01257</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 12:46pm<b>nandu1992</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 6:11am<b>Coltonomore</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 3:42pm<b>marydrunasky23</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 3:48pm<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 6:09pm<b>Tournesol143</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 2:50pm<b>sh07</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 12:16am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:05am<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 10:03pm<b>Littlest_things</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 1:20pm<b>failalltheway</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 8:33pm

Fucked!<b>AHzulu</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 6:43am

megapeyt's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of megapeyt's badges

megapeyt's favorite FMLs

Today, I let my friend borrow my car. She parked it in a towing zone, and it was towed. The best part is, it was towed by a bogus towing company. The cops assure me it's safe in a chop shop somewhere. FML

by pedestrian / 01/26/2011 at 12:07am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was grounded for not agreeing with an article on dating my mom found in a very strict magazine. The article told parents to monitor phone calls, make rumors about their children cheating on people and not allow their children anywhere but home. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2011 at 2:29am / United States (Utah) / Kids

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

by edulover / 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML

by stifledbyyou / 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, I participated in a charity auction at my university where the boys are "sold" to the highest bidder to be a slave for a day. My girlfriend and ex were bidding against each other. My ex won. FML

by Anonymous / 12/09/2010 at 2:58pm / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Love

Today, I woke up with extreme stomach pains. After being rushed to the hospital and having numerous tests performed, I was told my intestines were over-stretched with stool. I'm essentially so full of shit it hurts. FML

by fulloshit / 11/27/2010 at 9:17pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I was asked to crawl through a sun roof because one of my co workers locked her keys in her car. After I got the keys, instead of opening the car door, I climbed back out through the sun roof. To laughter. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2010 at 8:10pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

by Betchsadface / 07/13/2010 at 12:34am / United States / Animals

Today, my husband and I had sex for the first time because we pledged we wouldn't have sex until we were married. He's terrible. FML

by anonomus / 05/31/2010 at 9:35pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a video of me from over the weekend, naked, pretending to be a duck. What the fuck happened that night? FML

by laurenraeee / 05/25/2010 at 1:18am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML

by grossuncle / 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML

by Scaryman / 02/20/2010 at 7:03pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to be a stripper when she grew up, just like daddy's girlfriend. We're still married. FML

by ShayisPay101 / 02/15/2010 at 1:58pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I realized that the only reason my boyfriend has been coming over to hang out at my house for the past two months is because my little brother has an N64. I have become a third wheel to their mario kart dates. FML

by wowsucks / 01/30/2010 at 4:40am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous