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Offline (the 11/04/2014 at 2:11pm) | Search for a member
About megapeyt : I read FML for lack of a better thing to do in my spare time. Lotta comments but have yet to get an FML through the mods (CURSE YOU ALL!!!)
Most of the time I'm more looking for a decent pun I can use at an appropriate time later in my day
Imagine a world; where everything is said via puns...
Now if someone would kindly get the Mods to let me get an FML through, that'd be greaaaat, mmmmmmk?
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Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML
Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML
Today, I wanted to take my girlfriend to a nice dinner before prom. Her parents followed her in, and joined us to "keep an eye on me." They interrupted all our conversations, ate an expensive meal, then got up and walked out when the waitress brought the $95 check, leaving me to pay for it. FML
Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML
Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
Friday 29 May 2015