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megapeyt

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megapeyt

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2083
  • Number of comments : 120
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 44 posted

About megapeyt : I read FML for lack of a better thing to do in my spare time. Lotta comments but have yet to get an FML through the mods (CURSE YOU ALL!!!)

Most of the time I'm more looking for a decent pun I can use at an appropriate time later in my day

Imagine a world; where everything is said via puns...

Now if someone would kindly get the Mods to let me get an FML through, that'd be greaaaat, mmmmmmk?

megapeyt's page activity

Visits<b>Maria_BVB_Army</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:19am<b>RicanDucky</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 2:03am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 12:30pm<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:20pm<b>xMrsCarlilex</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 2:37pm<b>Caylee_G</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 10:08pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 2:11am<b>tyoung94</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 11:17am<b>trencher97</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 4:33pm<b>ladystate</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 6:26pm<b>dementxrs</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 4:06pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 11:58pm<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 11:28am<b>BrownBallSack</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 9:04pm<b>whatsupitsbrian</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 12:43am<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 12:08am<b>soccerstar1996</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 2:21pm<b>bitch_plz</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 4:44pm

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megapeyt's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65536) - you deserved it (18692)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot in the bedroom. Her phone rang and she stopped to have an hour long conversation with her ex. FML

#19754432
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35485) - you deserved it (3545)

On 06/08/2012 at 9:26am - intimacy - by unamyous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on in a water park changing stall. A woman and a security guard barged in and angrily told us that there were children around. We were escorted out of the park wearing nothing but our swimsuits. FML

#19221351
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7071) - you deserved it (65072)

On 03/05/2012 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I came back from a holiday and the friend who'd been looking after my cats returned my spare key. When I wanted to put some relaxing music on, I noticed that he'd switched most of my CDs around in their cases. I have over a thousand of them. Very funny, thanks. FML

#19148327
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21151) - you deserved it (4028)

On 02/23/2012 at 6:52pm - misc - by Veryfunny (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48506) - you deserved it (7723)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32865) - you deserved it (3121)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while working the drive-through at Mcdonald's, I was handing a gentleman his vanilla shake. He responded by popping the cap off, yelling "Fire in the hole!" And throwing it back in. He then quickly drove off. I was covered in vanilla shake. FML

#18279694
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35260) - you deserved it (4740)

On 11/18/2011 at 7:22am - work - by Anothernametaken (man) - United States

Today, my landlady cut off the Internet to my flat. She says she has no use for it, and doesn't want to keep it anymore. I have 3 online assignments due in the next week, and finals the following week. FML

#18261463
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27586) - you deserved it (2440)

On 11/16/2011 at 1:32am - work - by nyatzz - United States (Florida)

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28156) - you deserved it (3320)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML

#18086804
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13589) - you deserved it (34742)

On 10/27/2011 at 2:41am - misc - by Deborah - United States

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44846) - you deserved it (5031)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML

#17965176
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24277) - you deserved it (3702)

On 10/12/2011 at 1:14am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on a date at a restaurant with a guy. When he promised I wouldn't have to pay the bill, I didn't think he meant we'd be dining and dashing. FML

#17888720
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25068) - you deserved it (2953)

On 10/02/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by scared (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at work, my boss went to the single-stall bathroom on our floor. The next thing I know, I'm on suspension pending review because some asshole left an upper-decker in the toilet. Since I'm the office prankster, all suspicion is now on me. I've been framed by my own colleagues. FML

#17888360
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18045) - you deserved it (12796)

On 10/02/2011 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my younger brother brought home his new bagpipes. My older brother plays the drums. I'm currently preparing to sit the most important exams of my schooling life. FML

#17869851
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22218) - you deserved it (2017)

On 09/30/2011 at 8:52am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)



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