About mcxhunni : very bored, lol
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, while out to lunch, my sister called me and asked me to pick her up from the mall. I told her she'd have to wait. She got pissed off and started cursing at me, so I hung up on her. She called me back 37 times until I answered and yelled "WILL YOU LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE?" It was my boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16192) - you deserved it (39225)
On 03/06/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by jacks_smirking_revenge (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (353769) - you deserved it (66713)
On 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12010) - you deserved it (56128)
On 03/06/2009 at 12:49pm - kids - by wetbutt (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I put my picture into a celebrity look alike website. The three matches that came up were Barbra Streisand, Hillary Clinton, and Boy George. I'm 16. I'm a boy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42885) - you deserved it (5542)
On 03/06/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by oconron (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While Im brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40312) - you deserved it (20759)
On 03/05/2009 at 9:27pm - misc - by mr.palendrome (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I walked into my house to find everyone sitting around the table and looking sad. I thought it would be a good time to crack a joke and said "What's wrong? Grandma finally die?" Turns out she had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18658) - you deserved it (101194)
On 03/05/2009 at 2:33pm - health - by ubbernoob (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44266) - you deserved it (3281)
On 03/05/2009 at 2:14am - work - by Shell (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I passed by a small shop and decided to go in to look at the jeans. Before I could even step in, the shop owner told me expressionlessly, "All the sizes here are too small for you". FML
I agree, your life sucks (48023) - you deserved it (6048)
On 03/05/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Brrrb (woman) - Singapore
Today, my best friend who I have been secretly in love with forever, was ranting about her ex-girlfriend. Then she said : "If only you were gay, we'd be perfect for each other." So I took the chance to tell her I was. She responded : "Well I am still not attracted to you though." FML
I agree, your life sucks (61735) - you deserved it (6369)
On 03/04/2009 at 4:03pm - love - by alone_forever (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, at work, our new cute intern asked me if I could explain my work. Taking a cool posture sitting on her desk I explained. After 10 minutes I walked away, only to hear her laughing with the girl next to her. Turns out my fly was open. And I didn't wear underwear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11244) - you deserved it (56886)
On 03/03/2009 at 9:55am - work - by Peter80 (man) - Netherlands (Limburg)
Today, I was sitting in traffic for about an hour. I've heard stories about people doing the dirty in their cars and I never do anything risky so I thought, why not, I'll be here a while, no one can see me: I'll masturbate. Midway through I hear a tap on my driver's window. Its a police officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22341) - you deserved it (110387)
On 03/03/2009 at 1:29am - intimacy - by imanidiot (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I got a call from my friend who invited me to a theme party. It was a goth theme, and I decided to get real into it. I put on a trench coat, black skin tight pants, and black paint under the eyes. When I got there I was greeted by a kid in a pink popped collar. It wasn't a theme party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37071) - you deserved it (5679)
On 03/02/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by nerd (man) - United States (Kansas)
Today, my mother got a call from our old high school saying that they had fifteen freshmen boys in his office with a nude photo of me on their phones. I had sent that photo only to my boyfriend. Apparently he loves to share me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24065) - you deserved it (75043)
On 03/01/2009 at 1:58am - intimacy - by fmlisthebomb (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (126519) - you deserved it (3740)
On 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm - health - by TahRah (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23610) - you deserved it (85961)
On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 20 May 2013
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