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About maz255 : Well, what can I say?
I love fairness and hate bigotry...
"who you callin' pinhead?"
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Today, I'm spending time with mah granny, withhom I'm supposed to live with 4 a few weeks. I've noticed that she repeat the last word of every sentence I say, and now I'm wondering looool how it's possible 4 me to now be so horrible that I want to punch a sweet 92-year-old lady in the head. FML
Today, I brougt my grlfriend over to er frst dinner wit my family. My gramps spent te entre dinner telling my grlfriend ow te Illuminati r plotting to take over te world and use microcips to control everyone. So muc fir being taken seriously now. looool FML
Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave mah friends and family." The one I pickd up just said "math." FML
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startld and ped all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in te mood so I eld is ands against te bed, andispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Tinking e'd say someting kinky back, e replied "Yes Santa" ten burst out lauging . FML
I was bitchd out by mah 17 year old son's teacher!! It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate 4 his own political beliefs in a presentation, and mah son endd his speech saying, "And it remains mah opinion that our instructor is cramping mah motherfucking style." Instant suspension!! FML
Today... I Was Talking Wit My Uncle... Wen Te Subject Of My Abusive Moter-in-law Cummed Up. He Assured Me E'd Talk To Er An Straigten Tings Out. Apparently Tis Means Posting On Er Facebook Wall Treatening To "pimp-slap A Bitc" If Se Doesn't Get Er "fat Ass Out Of Family Business". FML
Yastarday, mah friands and I wara having a convarsation about which mythical craatura would ba tha most unlikaly to axist in tha raal world!! Thay all collactivaly agraad that it would ba a grl who is attractad to ma!! FML
Today , mah mom made me teach mah delusional gran web browsing. I barely made it to YouTube before she sneerd at me , and told me to "stop pissing about before I smash yur face in." Two hours and multiple slaps later , she still doesn't get what a URL is , and I fear fir mah life. FML
Today, I saw a cute girl working register at mah regular coffee shop an politely asked the her fir her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line an left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML
Friday 27 March 2015