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maz255

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maz255
  • Town/Country : Chicago, U.S
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 September 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1642
  • Number of comments : 177
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About maz255 : Well, what can I say?
I love fairness and hate bigotry...
A7x FTW

"who you callin' pinhead?"

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maz255's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm spending time with my granny, with whom I'm supposed to live with for a few weeks. I've noticed that she repeats the last word of every sentence I say, and now I'm wondering how it's possible for me to now be so horrible that I want to punch a sweet 92-year-old lady in the head. FML

#18387979
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21295) - you deserved it (4774)

On 11/29/2011 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I brought my girlfriend over to her first dinner with my family. My gramps spent the entire dinner telling my girlfriend how the Illuminati are plotting to take over the world and use microchips to control everyone. So much for being taken seriously now. FML

#18284255
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20532) - you deserved it (2657)

On 11/18/2011 at 8:58pm - love - by Trey - United States (Texas)

Today, in a large church youth group, we were told to write our current biggest trial on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and throw it in pile. I wrote "My mother's death and having to leave my friends and family." The one I picked up just said "math." FML

#18206362
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27063) - you deserved it (3347)

On 11/09/2011 at 10:52pm - misc - by Noslo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

#18202922
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24854) - you deserved it (17026)

On 11/09/2011 at 4:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

#18134142
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27062) - you deserved it (13336)

On 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm - intimacy - by HOe HOe HOe (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

#18095977
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22328) - you deserved it (4417)

On 10/28/2011 at 11:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

#18070582
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23578) - you deserved it (29060)

On 10/25/2011 at 6:15am - intimacy - by sad - Reserved

Today, I learned that it takes about half an hour to get melted cheese out of your hair. FML

#17956536
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15432) - you deserved it (4814)

On 10/10/2011 at 11:34pm - health - by jzappe - United States (California)

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

#17931369
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22911) - you deserved it (3031)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm - misc - by ...... (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27789) - you deserved it (3439)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mom made me teach my delusional gran web browsing. I barely made it to YouTube before she sneered at me, and told me to "stop pissing about before I smash your face in." Two hours and multiple slaps later, she still doesn't get what a URL is, and I fear for my life. FML

#17783230
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21978) - you deserved it (2418)

On 09/19/2011 at 8:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband went downstairs to play Call of Duty. When he came back after only 20 minutes I said, "Awww, did you miss me?" He said, "No, the controller died." FML

Today, I lied to my diary about getting laid. FML

#17686832
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36779) - you deserved it (25398)

On 09/07/2011 at 4:51am - intimacy - by sadsadperson (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend masturbating furiously. To Star Trek. FML

#17657733
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34153) - you deserved it (5082)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:08am - intimacy - by May - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a cute girl working register at my regular coffee shop and politely asked the her for her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line and left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML

#17431204
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29494) - you deserved it (4044)

On 08/10/2011 at 5:10pm - love - by 6u174r_d00d - United States



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