mayra_ramos88

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mayra_ramos88

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 February 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 312
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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mayra_ramos88's FML badges

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mayra_ramos88's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up after three years. I came home and when my dad asked what was wrong, I told him. His first reaction was, "Well damn it. Who'll go fishing with me now?" FML

by lovealways22 / 07/17/2012 at 3:19am / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I thought it would be funny to scare my dad for once, since he has scared me for fun dozens of times. It would have been funny, had he not punched me in the face. FML

by stupidprankster / 03/09/2012 at 5:10am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized the $40 iPhone case I bought to keep my new phone from getting scratched, scratched my iPhone. FML

by LadyGore / 02/19/2012 at 10:30am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

by immy504 / 11/30/2011 at 12:39am / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, my dad came to my graduate art show wearing a t-shirt saying "My other daughter is a science major". He'd had it specially made. FML

by art_major / 05/25/2011 at 10:06am / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told her to just honk the horn. She said that I was being selfish, that sex is a beautiful thing, and that we should let them finish. We sat there for at least five minutes. FML

by squirrels69ing / 05/21/2011 at 9:00pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, after teaching my 4 year old son about the concept of "Stranger Danger," we had gone to a park full of people. When I walked up to him to tell him we had to leave, he ran, screaming "Stranger! Don't touch me!" FML

by armywife980 / 05/03/2011 at 1:01am / Kids

Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML

by Burnt / 05/02/2011 at 5:33am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said: "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/06/2011 at 7:47am / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2011 at 3:09am / France / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

by anonymous / 12/18/2010 at 4:11am / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, I took my daughter to the zoo. I threw a piece of my sandwich towards a very cute chimpanzee. As a thank you, he threw a piece of crap at me, which exploded all over my shirt. FML

by Thanks / 11/27/2009 at 6:36pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work I grabbed some customer keys off the board. I was checking out their cool flashlight keychain. At the exact moment I realized it wasn't a keychain, I pepper sprayed myself directly in the right eye. FML

Today, as I was sitting in my car in a mall parking lot an old couple got into their new van and backed right into me. The man got out and in broken english decided it was no big deal. He turned to leave and tried to pat my back, but smacked my ass instead. I was hit by a car, and spanked for it. FML

by pleasebackintomycaragain / 04/23/2009 at 10:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I was driving home from swim practice with my mom. I glance over and see my brother's hot friend who I've been secretly in love with forever. He waved to me, and excitedly I waved back. I then hear my mom say "You're gonna die when you see how bad you look right now." FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2009 at 12:41am / United States (California) / Love