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may651

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may651
  • Town/Country : texas , United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 871
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About may651 : One of the real ones.

Message me and ask. I am a stand up girl.

may651's last visitors

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may651's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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may651's favorite FMLs

Today, I was messing around in computer class, when somebody called my name from the hall. Trying to be smooth, I tried rolling my chair backwards out into the hall. The wheels wasted no time jamming and sending me crashing face-first into the floor in front of everyone. FML

#19662501
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7103) - you deserved it (19365)

On 05/22/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, it was my birthday, and I woke up to my dad telling me that we're going to Disneyland. Apparently, by "we" he meant him and my mom. They did, however, make a point to say "happy birthday" before they left. FML

#19648886
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27553) - you deserved it (1610)

On 05/19/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by Schubey (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML

#19641486
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18510) - you deserved it (4359)

On 05/18/2012 at 11:05am - love - by Great. (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35982) - you deserved it (3781) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, as I got off the bus, I saw a girl counting her change making sure she had enough for the ride. Since it was my last stop for the day, I offered my day pass to her. She replied, "Get away, freak." FML

#19597071
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26526) - you deserved it (2183)

On 05/09/2012 at 10:40am - misc - by calidreaming - Japan (Osaka)

Today, I went to the beach. While I was enjoying the sun, an old man with prosthetic leg and no clothes on sat next to me. He took off his fake leg and put it behind his head. Then he opened his legs revealing his "stuff." I will never unsee this. Ever. FML

#19595886
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23503) - you deserved it (2015)

On 05/09/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by aligator1009 - United States

Today, I went to a river near my house. They have several swing ropes that you grab and then jump into the river. As I was about to let go of the rope, my leg got tangled and I was held underwater. My mom watched and laughed for a while before she came to help me. FML

#19585555
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18406) - you deserved it (2418)

On 05/07/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad found a couple of coins on the floor next to my desk, and gave me a lecture about how money doesn't grow on trees and how irresponsible I am when it comes to money. They were Chuck E. Cheese tokens. FML

#19585247
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18162) - you deserved it (2046)

On 05/07/2012 at 12:12am - money - by rofindie (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML

#19584401
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11965) - you deserved it (160371)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm - intimacy - by T3STI (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, an exchange student was telling us how he once used a black light to detect semen stains on his "abstinent" ex-girlfriend's face. I called him out on the obvious lie, saying it's an old urban legend. He wigged out, screamed that I'm a "bastarding shite-wank" and ran out of class. FML

#19573864
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17447) - you deserved it (4518)

On 05/04/2012 at 5:53pm - intimacy - by Garry (man) - United States

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28879) - you deserved it (1795)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sitting on the toilet, pregnant as ever and really sick. I asked my fiancé to bring me a pair of clean underwear. He did so and brought me some lacy underwear. They weren't mine. FML

#19568325
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38941) - you deserved it (2386)

On 05/03/2012 at 1:00pm - love - by Turnipseed3 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my underwear off, she looked at my penis, snorted, and covered her mouth. She claimed that her "allergies" were flaring and we have to wait until they clear up. FML

#19558140
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29010) - you deserved it (3262)

On 05/01/2012 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by rolyat (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML

#19557308
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23003) - you deserved it (2587)

On 05/01/2012 at 7:02am - intimacy - by epicsquishii (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I put my ironing board away in the bathroom. After closing the door, I heard a loud noise. The board had opened up while falling over, taking up the width of the room. I can't open the door. FML

#19533059
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20442) - you deserved it (3036) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/26/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Magicgwen - Sent from mobile version



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