About may651 : One of the real ones.
Lol I am the girl if you are retarded and don't see the Miss.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, I was slapped across the face by a girl in the waiting room at the dentist's office. She thought I was taking a picture of her breasts with my phone. I was smiling while reading other people's FMLs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31155) - you deserved it (2171)
On 12/03/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by karmamaybe - United States (South Dakota)
Today, my mom hung her new "Christmas Clock" on the wall. It plays a different Christmas carol every hour, on the hour. It's only December 2nd and I'm already starting to understand why suicide rates sky rocket this time of year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16262) - you deserved it (1476)
On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my parents heard from my sister that I'd recently lost my virginity to my girlfriend. I've never been bitched out so viciously in my life, and yet my sister, whom everyone knows has had numerous casual sexual partners this year, is treated like a princess 24/7. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19298) - you deserved it (1324)
On 12/02/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)
Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17535) - you deserved it (3510)
On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML
I agree, your life sucks (30180) - you deserved it (4300)
On 12/01/2012 at 9:54am - intimacy - by me. - United States
Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20868) - you deserved it (2059)
On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was enjoying a nice bath, when one of my cats jumped up on the rim and started purring. I thought it was sweet, until my other cat ran in and body-slammed the first into the tub with me. Being a conscientious cat owner, I hadn't de-clawed them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16148) - you deserved it (4987)
On 11/27/2012 at 2:52pm - animals - by Neutered (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17409) - you deserved it (1018)
On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was nicknamed "Sandman." Not after the bad-ass Spider Man villain but rather because my personality is so boring it puts people to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11604) - you deserved it (2516)
On 11/22/2012 at 2:25am - misc - by zzz - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14019) - you deserved it (2538)
On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19409) - you deserved it (1470)
On 11/20/2012 at 11:50pm - misc - by vanillatwilight2 (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I called off my engagement, after finding out my fiancé is cheating on me. I recently started a new job, and in anticipation of getting married, I asked that my username include his surname. They can't be changed, so now I get to log in every day under that sorry bastard's surname. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18886) - you deserved it (6064)
On 11/20/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by notAMrs (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23100) - you deserved it (3235)
On 11/19/2012 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by wow babe - United States (Maryland)
Today, I had to forcibly separate a boy from my daughter after he grabbed her and started shoving her around. I complained to his mother, only to have her shout, "mind your fucking business" and say that her son can do whatever the hell he wants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19627) - you deserved it (959)
On 11/18/2012 at 4:22pm - kids - by WELL FUCK YOU KINDLY, MA'AM (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18071) - you deserved it (1878)
On 11/15/2012 at 9:40pm - misc - by needanewride - United States (Massachusetts)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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