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maxtheripper666

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maxtheripper666

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  • Number of visits : 297
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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maxtheripper666's page activity

Visits<b>ZombieSazza</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:46pm<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 10:49pm<b>eezila</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 11:49am<b>Riiley</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 6:56pm<b>olpally</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:32pm<b>JD1147</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 4:34am<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 2:04pm<b>persianninja</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 2:01pm<b>bertyogurt</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 12:41am

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maxtheripper666's favorite FMLs

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51648) - you deserved it (4525)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML

#20509476
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29600) - you deserved it (6924)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia

Today, the attractive guy I barely speak to in my statistics class gave me a rose for Valentine's Day because he remembered they were my favorite. My husband got me a roll of quarters and told me to go buy myself "something pretty." FML

#20507681
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40829) - you deserved it (3986)

On 02/15/2013 at 1:07am - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to suffer through a two-hour long trivia game with my boyfriend's family. As if that wasn't annoying enough, my boyfriend caused the pair of us to lose by just a single point, because he answered "Quebec" to the question of "What is the capital city of France?" FML

#20480093
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29106) - you deserved it (6616)

On 01/26/2013 at 5:57pm - misc - by twohoursclosertodeath (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while sledding with my daughter, I tried getting her to go down a steeper slope than she's used to. She was worried she'd crash, so I went first to show her how it's done. I lost control halfway down the hill, bailed, and rolled into a tree. My wife has it on video. FML

Today, while going on a jog through the countryside, I discovered that it is actually possible outside of crappy TV shows to have a rifle leveled at you, and to be shouted at to, "Get off my land." FML

#20432522
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20682) - you deserved it (16252)

On 12/30/2012 at 6:48pm - misc - by fuckinghicks (man) - United States

Today, my husband and I were told by our elderly neighbors that they can hear us having sex a lot. To top it off, the elderly man said while patting his wife's arm with a smile, "Carol used to make noises like that too, back in the day." FML

#20136326
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28593) - you deserved it (6306)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by Ceej - United States (Michigan)

Today, my crush and I were volunteering at a local farm. He confessed to me that I'm one of the most beautiful girls he's ever seen. Just as he leaned in to kiss me, I lost my footing and fell into a pile of horse shit. He just stood there, pointing and laughing. FML

#20109154
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26536) - you deserved it (3078)

On 10/09/2012 at 2:43pm - love - by FarmerGirl - Canada (Quebec)

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59541) - you deserved it (3062)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

#20068529
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24010) - you deserved it (3663)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:03am - kids - by AGeeksWife (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was cycling with my uncle and became increasingly frustrated as we got further and further from our intended destination. It took me a while to figure out that I had somehow lost my uncle and was following a complete stranger. FML

#20066014
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9474) - you deserved it (21866)

On 09/10/2012 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, the acne on one side of my face has flared up at the corners of my mouth, making me look just like The Joker. FML

Today, after finishing a song during karaoke, a man came up to me and held out his hand. Quite flattered, I shook it, said thanks and that I was glad he enjoyed it. Turns out he was next and just wanted the microphone. FML

#20049122
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16385) - you deserved it (8563)

On 08/30/2012 at 4:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

#20026086
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24393) - you deserved it (1601)

On 08/17/2012 at 7:26am - animals - by byegeorge (woman) - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

#20024799
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7288) - you deserved it (41671)

On 08/16/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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