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max367

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max367
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max367's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent over 20 minutes trying to convince my daughter that the word she was trying to use was "Back-pack" and not "Back-back". I never convinced her. She is 16 years old. FML

Today, I gave my boss a nick name. Everyone thought it was funny. Unfortunately "The Troll" was behind me and heard everything. FML

#18146930
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8319) - you deserved it (37864)

On 11/03/2011 at 12:13pm - work - by hatemyboss - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I gave my boss a nick name. Everyone thought it was funny. Unfortunately "The Troll" was behind me and heard everything. FML

#18146930
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8319) - you deserved it (37864)

On 11/03/2011 at 12:13pm - work - by hatemyboss - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML

#18139418
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27158) - you deserved it (4925)

On 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my first Halloween in America since moving from Russia. While handing candy to children, my roommate told me to compliment a little girl by saying "You have a face only a parent could love". I found out it isn't a compliment when I was punched by her Dad. FML

#18123413
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31441) - you deserved it (4543)

On 10/31/2011 at 8:18pm - kids - by VladyBoi (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while trying to get my phone to charge, I shoved in the cable harder and harder and tried to wobble it so my phone would charge. After snapping the USB input from the force, I saw the plug was switched off. FML

#18106914
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5771) - you deserved it (36515)

On 10/29/2011 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Poole)

Today, my boyfriend confessed that he hates horror films. Our relationship was born out of our 'love' for horror films. I have endured 3 years of watching films that absolutely terrify me only to find out he doesn't like them either. FML

#18101877
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12032) - you deserved it (40747)

On 10/29/2011 at 7:32am - love - by duped (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML

#18086804
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12167) - you deserved it (32293)

On 10/27/2011 at 2:41am - misc - by Deborah - United States

Today, as I was driving to work, I witnessed a kid apparently getting jumped. Being a good citizen, I got out and started yelling at them. I ended up alongside the kid in the hospital. FML

#18078650
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32869) - you deserved it (3849)

On 10/26/2011 at 3:41am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML

#18069219
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22301) - you deserved it (1301)

On 10/25/2011 at 12:30am - work - by fire1 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15441) - you deserved it (43160) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML

#18041675
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19193) - you deserved it (32189)

On 10/21/2011 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

#18037995
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43358) - you deserved it (2902)

On 10/21/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by prostitutes boyfriend - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I thought it would be a great idea to tell my co-worker to calm down when he appeared to be very uptight. He thought it would be a great idea to punch me right in the face. FML

#18037423
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18940) - you deserved it (10873)

On 10/21/2011 at 7:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, whilst trying on a pair of jeans, I got my genitals caught in my fly. I'm a woman. FML

#18034396
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27464) - you deserved it (8100)

On 10/20/2011 at 9:24pm - health - by box bulge - China



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