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  • Number of visits : 7726
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max367's page activity

Visits<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 11:19pm<b>thisguy22</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 3:48am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 7:02am<b>meghancuma</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 9:41pm<b>shnoel14</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 3:02pm<b>alaillama</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:46am<b>pandoraisme</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 11:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 5:24pm<b>zMEEHANz</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 5:20pm<b>MyUsernameisEpic</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 4:44am<b>MissEmma</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 6:59pm<b>_awwhellnaw_</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 10:57pm<b>A07</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 3:00pm<b>KatPlaysMC</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 11:19pm<b>Chaith</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 6:15pm<b>WolfAvenge</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 2:15am<b>sonsofadmirals</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 7:48pm<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 9:01am

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max367's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of max367's badges

max367's favorite FMLs

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49560) - you deserved it (3955)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, my boss's obese bully of a grandson had a seizure. Being the only physician around, I had to rush in to tend to him. Except it wasn't a seizure as such. My daughter had found my taser and used it on him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48442) - you deserved it (5078)

On 11/26/2013 at 2:05pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got my dad to fill in a questionnaire my teacher handed out on Friday. One question said "I would like to see my son/daughter ______." My dad wrote in the blank: "less often." FML


I agree, your life sucks (50293) - you deserved it (4373)

On 11/17/2013 at 3:27pm - kids - by :( (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, it hit me that I'm incredibly pathetic, when at the age of 21, I tucked my stuffed animals into bed with me, facing in different directions so they could keep watch for monsters while I slept. FML


I agree, your life sucks (46130) - you deserved it (15395)

On 10/16/2013 at 2:48pm - misc - by SaveMeTeddy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend accused me of cheating because according to him, our child does not have his hair color, eye color, or other facial features. Our son is five days old, bald and hasn't opened his eyes much. The closest thing I can probably compare him to is an old, wrinkly potato. FML


I agree, your life sucks (57163) - you deserved it (4537)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:55am - kids - by thisguy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28241) - you deserved it (82794)

On 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, the guy on the floor above me decided it was time for a tuba jam session. Apparently optimal tuba time is 2am. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41744) - you deserved it (2823)

On 09/15/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by sleeplessinrichmond - United States (New York)

Today, I was talking to my husband about our favorite TV show, when he took my face in his hands and sweetly whispered, "You're so pretty. Why must you ruin it with words?" FML


Today, my pregnant wife was crying, so I let her sit on my lap so I could comfort her. She quickly started laughing in embarrassment as she peed on my leg. FML


I agree, your life sucks (57405) - you deserved it (6599)

On 09/09/2013 at 4:16pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing with my phone after midnight, and I kept getting calls from a withheld number. The guy just breathed heavily and wouldn't speak. When the third call came, I asked "who the hell are you?" The call ended, and my dad yelled from outside my door: "ME! Now go to sleep!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (41142) - you deserved it (13856)

On 08/30/2013 at 1:24pm - kids - by thanks, dad... (woman) - Romania (Maramures)

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML


I agree, your life sucks (56320) - you deserved it (6307)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by aly55a_mariie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (55849) - you deserved it (12215)

On 08/02/2013 at 12:39am - intimacy - by whyeventry? (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59927) - you deserved it (9832)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States

Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML


I agree, your life sucks (58853) - you deserved it (4939)

On 07/20/2013 at 3:37pm - money - by Nick (man) - United States (California)

Today, I called a tree removal company to have my diseased elm removed. When I got home from work, I was surprised to find it still there. Not as surprised as my neighbor was to discover that his tree was missing, nor as surprised as his children when they saw there was no more tree-house. FML


I agree, your life sucks (57056) - you deserved it (4273)

On 07/18/2013 at 10:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #20
  • Here we are in November! Winter is here, for most of us, it's dark, grey and depressing and if you're the kind of person who watches network news 24/7, you're probably going to need some cheering up.…

Monday 30 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

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