max367

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max367

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9547
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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max367's page activity

Visits<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 1:54am<b>Sunshinenwhiskey</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 1:24pm<b>caggybandicoot</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 8:47am<b>oliversoden101</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 5:57pm<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 1:01am<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 3:21pm<b>quazimozart</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 7:09pm<b>TacoMan32</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 11:55pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 5:31am<b>Sleep_lover654</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 1:43pm<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 1:20pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 2:42am<b>nodeathtoall</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 3:30pm<b>kittykittyrun</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 9:05pm<b>idk0002</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 2:08pm<b>moocowmilk0</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 1:54pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 9:42pm<b>NerdyTherapist</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 5:16pm

Fucked!<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 6:36pm<b>kittykittyrun</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 3:06am<b>KatPlaysMC</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 4:36am<b>Chaith</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 12:15am<b>clairedabear</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 5:00am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 5:08am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 12:57am

max367's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of max367's badges

max367's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend called me freaking out because of an online pregnancy test. She was scared because she had no idea that she was pregnant, let alone having a fifteen pound baby. The website is a joke. She goes to an Ivy League school, and I couldn't even get into community college. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2009 at 12:21am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up after a night out at the bar, immediately remembering that I had lost my cell phone, my ID and somehow spent $100. Feeling like shit already, my friend then goes on to tell me that I flashed the entire bar, and ran around the hotel naked. FML

by drunkennight / 11/22/2009 at 10:45pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML

by anonymous / 11/22/2009 at 3:23pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my manager sent me a text message with a picture of Santa masturbating, with a message that said he wished me a white Christmas. FML

by lonewolf2701 / 11/22/2009 at 4:15am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was at a zoo with some friends in Germany. People were talking to this bird and it responded in complete, grammatically correct German sentences. One of my friends said 'Wow, that bird has better grammar than the exchange student!' A bird speaks better German than me. FML

by bird-brain / 11/21/2009 at 7:19am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Animals

Today, my condo board refused to lift the new policy requiring pet owners to carry dogs in common areas because someone's dog is peeing in the hall. I can't physically carry my two dogs, so I'm now forced to wheel them through the building in a borrowed baby stroller. FML

by Slivered / 11/18/2009 at 4:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I realized why my 50 year old Dad's 30 something girlfriend looked so familiar. She is in all my parents wedding photos... as the flower girl. FML

by usmcgirl / 11/17/2009 at 10:18pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a pig kidney dissection in Biology. I see a 'sack' which appeared to contain a liquid. Being the curious type, I cut open the sack, spraying said liquid over me and my desk. My teacher, after giggling, informed me that the liquid was in fact urine. I was pissed on by a dead pig. FML

by Araya / 11/17/2009 at 11:12am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was the paramedic at the scene of a car accident. One lady was hurt, and we had trouble getting any information from her as she was sobbing. I radioed in the details and said "...a lady in her mid 30's, ETA 10 minutes." She stopped crying, slapped me, and said, "I'm 28." FML

by Paramedic / 11/17/2009 at 6:16am / United Kingdom (Rochdale) / Work

Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 6:26pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I wore my cool new shirt with an oriental character on it to class. The Chinese TA burst into laughter and told me the shirt read, "I am a sad, pathetic person." FML

by Molly / 11/14/2009 at 2:48pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

by swedishdude / 11/14/2009 at 8:37am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was reading my students' Halloween stories I made them write for my creative writing class in high school. One of my students wrote about attacking me. She got my street address perfect and everything. FML

by Teaching / 11/12/2009 at 2:17am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML

by DangerZone / 11/11/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was turned down for a job as a cashier at Best Buy. I worked like hell to get into and then graduate from one of the top Telecommunication schools in the country. I spent all my time with extracurriculars to help my resume instead of partying like my friends. I can't even be a cashier. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous