Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

max367

Online | Search for a member

max367

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6383
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

max367's page activity

Visits<b>pandoraisme</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 11:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 5:24pm<b>zMEEHANz</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 5:20pm<b>MyUsernameisEpic</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 4:44am<b>MissEmma</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 6:59pm<b>_awwhellnaw_</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 10:57pm<b>MDoremis</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 3:02pm<b>A07</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 3:00pm<b>KatPlaysMC</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 11:19pm<b>Chaith</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 6:15pm<b>WolfAvenge</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 2:15am<b>sonsofadmirals</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 7:48pm<b>Dougie_Bee</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 9:01am<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 1:51am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 6:12am<b>clairedabear</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 11:00pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 11:08pm<b>cheyyeee</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 6:34pm

Fucked!<b>KatPlaysMC</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 4:36am<b>Chaith</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 12:15am<b>clairedabear</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 5:00am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 5:08am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 12:57am

max367's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of max367's badges

max367's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband missed the toilet again. I would have been less disgusted if he'd peed this time. FML

#21411283
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29454) - you deserved it (2277)

On 05/17/2015 at 1:10am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I rolled up a newspaper and smashed a huge spider in my room. As I went to scoop it up with a tissue, it lurched away and fell near my bed. I can't find it, but I can sure as fuck sense the pure evil coming from it. Looks like I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight. FML

#21369803
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (109) - you deserved it (4920)

On 03/07/2015 at 7:14am - animals - by farksh (woman) - Australia

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by canceling our relationship status on Facebook. I commented in disbelief, only for my dad to reply "#rekt", then "But seriously, about time. She's gonna give your balls back, right?" Thanks for the support. FML

#21334865
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26500) - you deserved it (3160)

On 01/11/2015 at 12:57am - love - by kumcat (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up after a night of New Year's Eve partying. I remember the night going great. What I don't remember is laying naked in the shower while my girlfriend ran water over my body to make me feel better. I also made my own funeral plans because I was convinced I was going to die. FML

#21328812
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24971) - you deserved it (6690)

On 01/01/2015 at 6:02pm - misc - by CK95 - United States

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML

#21318416
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35468) - you deserved it (6553)

On 12/16/2014 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Extravirgin (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

#21300031
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28598) - you deserved it (3350)

On 11/16/2014 at 4:44am - love - by tine - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I get to add spaghetti sauce to my rather extensive list of things that don't belong in a person's eye but that end up in mine anyway. Other items include molten cheese, rock salt, orange juice, chips of nail polish, cotton fibers, and firework ash. FML

#21299049
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28695) - you deserved it (4678)

On 11/14/2014 at 4:58pm - health - by gspotter (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

#21281971
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37387) - you deserved it (11321)

On 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by John (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was driving with my grandma and she was going 30 over the speed limit. To slow her down, I said, "Hey look, the police". She slammed on the brakes so hard I hit my head on the dashboard. FML

#21279207
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31649) - you deserved it (15699)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:56pm - misc - by karmaaa - United States (Iowa)

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

#21277425
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33189) - you deserved it (4478)

On 10/14/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by longdrive - United States (California)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41948) - you deserved it (11696)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49368) - you deserved it (21309)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48318) - you deserved it (27439)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56426) - you deserved it (5220) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)



FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie replies #1
  • Hello all you crybabies, from Land's End to John o' Groats. Yes, I'm finally here my lovelies. Since last week, my inbox hasn't stopped humming with the noise of new mail dropping into it, letters full…

Friday 31 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: