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Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Mobility
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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47961) - you deserved it (3722)
On 02/01/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20267) - you deserved it (6503)
On 01/14/2012 at 1:52am - intimacy - by haggisbowl - United States
Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41242) - you deserved it (36395)
On 01/08/2012 at 9:36am - intimacy - by omgwhyme (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25944) - you deserved it (20261)
On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33357) - you deserved it (7075)
On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my buddy told me he was going to get an HIV test at the health department. Without thinking, I told him to "think positive". FML
I agree, your life sucks (22454) - you deserved it (5504)
On 11/11/2011 at 3:42am - health - by devinchi (man) - United States
Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23125) - you deserved it (28679)
Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36077) - you deserved it (7721)
On 10/18/2011 at 11:01am - intimacy - by imy - United States (Texas)
Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (26608) - you deserved it (5332)
On 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by Pookaa (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, there was a guy following me, so to avoid him, I crouched down and basically waddled behind a wall to get past him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I get around the corner, while still waddling, was an unhappy midget couple staring right at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20379) - you deserved it (3772)
On 10/03/2011 at 8:37am - misc - by Mike Polk - United States
Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34238) - you deserved it (8536)
On 08/31/2011 at 12:04pm - kids - by MJjunior (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28631) - you deserved it (8927)
On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34374) - you deserved it (4578)
Today, I was in a pool locker room, surrounded by semi-naked people. While changing into my clothes, I accidentally pushed a button on my phone, causing it to make the loud, unmistakable camera shutter sound effect. Everyone definitely heard it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27311) - you deserved it (4234)
On 07/22/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Roode (man) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, I was using the restroom when a little girl tried to open my stall. It was locked, so she slid under the door and tried to have a conversation with me while I was pooping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35562) - you deserved it (3133)
On 06/20/2011 at 6:42pm - misc - by shyshy96679 - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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