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mattbaker

Offline (the 05/27/2015 at 12:06pm) | Search for a member

mattbaker

1Fucked!

mattbaker
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 March 1999 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 458
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About mattbaker : I am an Indian teenager...

mattbaker's page activity

Visits<b>jessLIKESpotato</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 1:05am<b>17031990</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 7:11pm<b>justmeee12</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 11:24am<b>SharnaaaBanana</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 8:07am<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 4:55pm<b>rae_siah_3x</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 8:47am<b>C7</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 12:15pm<b>ToxicPlant</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 10:31pm<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 11:04am<b>iajm02</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 10:49am<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:26pm<b>DUB_Speeding</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 5:07pm<b>BeautifulLiesx</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 1:08pm<b>MDoremis</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 1:04am<b>gmian</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 12:53pm<b>colton_colton</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 11:12pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 1:03pm<b>winchestinalock</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 8:31am

Fucked!<b>SharnaaaBanana</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 2:07pm

mattbaker's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of mattbaker's badges

mattbaker's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into a heated argument with my girlfriend. Not because of anything I did, but because she actually believes that pasteurization is when a pastor blesses a dairy product. "You know, like kosher." FML

#21416018
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26415) - you deserved it (2449)

On 05/26/2015 at 11:12am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I strained so hard trying to take a crap that I broke a blood vessel in my eye. FML

#21414271
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25784) - you deserved it (5523)

On 05/23/2015 at 12:38am - misc - by Strainer - United States (California)

Today, I checked my son's browser history, as he's been acting strangely around his computer recently. I found several bizarre Google searches, including but not limited to: "unicorn dick-farts", "sharting kittens", and "can you get AIDS from Asians?" What the fuck is wrong with him? FML

#21414033
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27720) - you deserved it (4552)

On 05/22/2015 at 2:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I went to the yearly town carnival with my friends. I hadn't slept well the night before and when I got onto the scariest ride, I somehow fell half asleep. I woke up upside down and ended up peeing myself in terror. FML

#21403515
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28781) - you deserved it (4823)

On 05/02/2015 at 5:59pm - misc - by Upside-Down Sleeper. - United States (Maryland)

Today, I desperately needed to let off some steam at work, so I went outside and screamed obscenities at the top of my lungs, before heading back inside. The police then showed up to investigate complaints of a "raving lunatic" in the area. FML

#21403035
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19123) - you deserved it (21899)

On 05/01/2015 at 6:17pm - work - by RavingLunatic (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a drunk man started yelling at the lamppost outside my house, demanding to be let inside, all while my neighbors watched. That man is my dad. FML

#21402962
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27267) - you deserved it (2199)

On 05/01/2015 at 4:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got fired for having a visible tattoo on my neck. The tattoo in question is a scar from a surgery I had 2 months ago. The same one paid for by my employer's insurance and missed 2 weeks of work for. FML

#21381191
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31682) - you deserved it (1882)

On 03/25/2015 at 8:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, because I thought I was about to have an asthma attack, I had a panic attack. Then, the panic attack caused me to have a real asthma attack. FML

#21378889
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28869) - you deserved it (3826)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:14am - health - by pikachu_43 - United States (California)

Today, one of the guys I work with ran his finger down the back of my shirt and said, "Just checking to see if you're wearing a bra today". FML

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

#21372435
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26503) - you deserved it (7819)

On 03/11/2015 at 9:55am - kids - by birdisnottheword (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while discussing my grades with my mother, she told me that when she was my age she was dumb but hardworking, and my dad was lazy but very smart. She then added, "You managed to get the worst out of each of us." FML

#21372077
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28456) - you deserved it (3147)

On 03/10/2015 at 8:19pm - misc - by Daughter of the year - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, my boyfriend's little sister told me she hates me. I thought she was just a jealous, whiny tard like most kids are, until she calmly walked over to the wall and headbutted it hard. She burst into tears, ran out of the room, and told my boyfriend I hit her. He believed her. FML

#21369365
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35027) - you deserved it (2880)

On 03/06/2015 at 3:44pm - kids - by single&alone (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as I was riding my bike home from school, I saw a homeless man sitting on a bench. I was about to walk up to him and give him money, but before I could do anything my mother walked up and kissed him. My mom is dating this guy. FML

#21368890
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35287) - you deserved it (2790)

On 03/05/2015 at 8:38pm - love - by Not Homeless - United States (New Jersey)



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