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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, while in the middle of having sex with my husband, instead of saying something sexy in my ear, he whispered, "We are so gonna make pizza after this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40417) - you deserved it (5034)
On 07/26/2009 at 12:37am - intimacy - by PTKFML (woman) - United States
Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47711) - you deserved it (20011)
On 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm - love - by Ella (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22285) - you deserved it (46271)
On 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm - health - by dearme (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, was my sister's and dad's birthday. I accidentally mixed up the gifts I got for them and my dad ended up with a vibrator. He wasn't very happy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11466) - you deserved it (44103)
On 05/25/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by silvercity09 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was impressing dinner guests by spinning my new baby in the air (something she loves), when she projectile vomited over the dinner table and the guests. My wife, who had spent three hours cooking was not impressed. Once of the guests was also a sympathy spewer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10421) - you deserved it (28098)
On 05/15/2009 at 6:20am - kids - by Sodge (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was at a restaurant when I heard a young girl telling her father she didn't think she was pretty. When I got up to leave, I walked past her table and told her she was beautiful. Her dad then punched me in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50031) - you deserved it (10455)
On 05/07/2009 at 11:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21075) - you deserved it (73920)
On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was emailing my professor about what chapters our test is on this afternoon. She accidentally emailed me informing me of the date she went on last night, including that she "got laid... yay!!" and a picture. I still don't know what chapters I'm being tested on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (84873) - you deserved it (4266)
On 04/20/2009 at 1:12pm - intimacy - by TMI (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I opened my birthday present from my grandfather. It was a map of the USA color coded by regional percentage of available men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44992) - you deserved it (2768)
On 03/07/2009 at 11:28pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she randomly asked me "does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked "does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (154966) - you deserved it (19180)
On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was watching 24 and realized that Jack Bauer had gotten more action in 5 hours than I had in 5 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20043) - you deserved it (5048)
On 02/08/2009 at 2:39am - misc - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I tried demonstrate to my little brother that, unlike what he sees in cartoons, it is impossible to slip on a banana peel. I'm not too sure he's convinced. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4796) - you deserved it (19774)
On 11/18/2008 at 10:44pm - kids - by j0j0 - France (Aquitaine)
Today, I was on a date with my new boyfriend. I acted very flirty and laughed very loudly to show him how funny he was. I laughed so loudly that I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19608) - you deserved it (11297)
On 11/18/2008 at 7:16am - love - by elsaza - Sent from mobile version
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