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mastory96

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mastory96

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  • Number of visits : 9267
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mastory96's page activity

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mastory96's favorite FMLs

Today, as I opened my diary to write a new entry, I noticed that every page had little side notes about what I had written. It had an extra long note on the page where I wrote about losing my virginity in great detail. All of the notes ended with "Love, Mom." FML

#4346693
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47285) - you deserved it (8153)

On 08/06/2009 at 10:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was getting it on with a girl I've been talking to for three months. She's a year younger than me and it was her first time. So, I went easy. After five minutes she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said I remind her of her dad. FML

#4346574
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72893) - you deserved it (6655)

On 08/06/2009 at 10:03pm - love - by Jeremy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found what I assumed was my laptop, though my mother has the same one. As I opened it, I was greeted by a video of my father waving. He wasn't using his hands. FML

#4332975
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48576) - you deserved it (4320)

On 08/06/2009 at 11:40am - misc - by daddysboy123 (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, while eating at a restaurant, I commented to the waiter about how large the pizza was. He then writes down his number, pats his crotch fondly, and informs me that "everything" I'm going to find at that restaurant is going to be big. He was serious. FML

#4332436
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41537) - you deserved it (6618)

On 08/06/2009 at 11:05am - misc - by Screwupify (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while eating at a restaurant, I commented to the waiter about how large the pizza was. He then writes down his number, pats his crotch fondly, and informs me that "everything" I'm going to find at that restaurant is going to be big. He was serious. FML

#4332436
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41537) - you deserved it (6618)

On 08/06/2009 at 11:05am - misc - by Screwupify (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

#4331370
818 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24942) - you deserved it (486178)

On 08/06/2009 at 9:35am - misc - by who_could_it_be - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to come back home early from my holidays. Why? I had asked my grandmother to water my plants, some of which are illegal. Instead of doing it herself, she asked her neighbor... who is a cop. FML

#4330771
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20107) - you deserved it (110998)

On 08/06/2009 at 8:27am - misc - by Cowan - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, I walked into my new maths class. I stepped inside only to be yelled at by the teacher for nearly 15 minutes. I was then told never to enter her class again and was sent to the principal. My identical twin brother was in her class the period before me. He also has a thing for older women. FML

#4329810
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58569) - you deserved it (2822)

On 08/06/2009 at 6:10am - misc - by slamo (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML

#4329775
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65412) - you deserved it (11932)

On 08/06/2009 at 6:05am - intimacy - by OhFseriously123 (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, I was sitting on the bus next to a hot guy who was texting. I sneaked a peak at his phone to see if he was texting a girl so I could know if he was single. As I looked at his screen, he turned it towards me and typed in caps "STOP BEING A CREEPER." He got out of his seat and off the bus. FML

#4305194
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7852) - you deserved it (78032)

On 08/05/2009 at 9:37am - love - by TextLoser (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was in the middle of an intense orgasm when we heard the panicky voice of his little sister saying there was an emergency downstairs. He jumped up and left to see what the matter was. The big emergency? The Wii remotes had dead batteries. FML

#4304989
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52505) - you deserved it (8508)

On 08/05/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by some_girl_19 (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I found a pair of women's underwear in the laundry that wasn't mine. I confronted my boyfriend about it. They were his. FML

#4285765
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45959) - you deserved it (6441)

On 08/04/2009 at 4:21pm - love - by Angry (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date night down a dirt road to a field in the middle of nowhere. He packed some blankets, a bottle of wine, and some condoms. He didn't know the dirt road was actually a driveway until all of our clothes were off. FML



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