Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About master_plan : I'm the guy with the plan
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, my dad lost his mind over the meteorite incident in Russia. He's convinced that it's part of some big government conspiracy to cover up a UFO crash-landing, and now he won't stop dismissively calling us "sheep" and telling us "do the research" just because we don't agree with him. FML
Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML
Today, while I was babysitting, the toddler was feeding me banana slices from her tray while I was cutting up clay for her to mold. It was all fine until she shoved something hard and crunchy into my mouth. I immediately spat it out into my hand. It was a dead cricket she found on the floor. FML
Friday 28 August 2015