marrymarz

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Offline (the 11/03/2014 at 11:59am)

marrymarz

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 756
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About marrymarz : I

marrymarz's page activity

Visits<b>ogoodrich</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 12:17am<b>WallyQ</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 3:54am<b>Comet_Candy</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:43pm<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:06pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 2:15am<b>vividpictures</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 2:45pm<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 9:45pm<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 10:01pm<b>Amarie33</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 10:42am<b>Patty410</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 7:56pm<b>zanlyxa</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 10:44pm<b>mario2012</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 2:35pm<b>KyngJulian</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 12:07am<b>mkayden</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 2:10am<b>FML_Elle</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 5:58pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 10:34am<b>dfox5515</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 9:08pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 4:18pm

marrymarz's FML badges

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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marrymarz's favorite FMLs

Today, I watched with mild confusion as a piece of paper tucked underneath my windshield wiper flapped around on the highway. What could it be? Surely not a parking ticket. Powerless, I watched it fly away. It must have been the insurance information for the person who swiped the back of my car. FML

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

by sam_666777 / 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML

by in big trouble / 08/23/2014 at 8:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2014 at 11:19am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I should be spending my birthday with my boyfriend of 8 months. Instead he's visiting his ex, who's pregnant with a baby that "may or may not be" his. FML.

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 11:13am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

by Ballsy427 / 07/25/2014 at 8:05am / United States (Armed Forces Pacific) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I decided to tan naked in a secluded part of my yard, so I wouldn't get tan lines. I even felt adventurous enough to leave my bikini and towel inside. This idea backfired however when my mom stopped home from work, assumed I wasn't home, and locked all the doors before she left again. FML

by Anonymous / 07/13/2014 at 12:08am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting a 9-year-old kid, when she got thirsty and asked for a drink. All I could find was some kind of Mexican fruit drink, but I didn't realize until too late that it was actually hard liquor. I had to scrub her mouth out with toothpaste and put her to bed to cover it all up. FML

by cantprovenothing / 04/18/2014 at 5:31pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, after a dental appointment, my lips were numb. On the bus on my way back home, the cutest girl smiled at me. In attempt to smile back, I forgot my lips were numb and ended up spitting my chewing gum at her. I had to switch buses. FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2014 at 6:12am / Malta / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor called the police for the seventh time because he's convinced I'm a vampire. He's also gotten in the habit of leaving garlic cloves in my yard. My parents come next week. FML

by Vampprobs / 03/24/2014 at 9:52pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was ordering a pizza over the phone. When the guy asked for my order, I yelled "Hey, you guys wanted pepperoni, right?" In reality, I was yelling this to my cat. College hasn't made me many friends so far. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2014 at 4:01pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my job as a bouncer at a music venue, a guy got his nose broken in a rowdy mosh pit. When I went to help him up and see if he was okay, he said, "It was an accident, please don't kick me out," but the word "please" came out as a hot spray of his blood across my face. FML

by ColoradoGirl420 / 03/24/2014 at 2:53pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to study for an important test but I could barely focus because my roommate had his music blasting at full volume. Since we get along well, I decided to put up with it. I just found out he forgot to turn it off and left over 6 hours ago. FML

by lovehaterelationship / 03/10/2014 at 2:43pm / Austria (Steiermark) / Miscellaneous

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

by cunning glassist / 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love