About maronofhearts : Rawrr.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
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Today, I told my dad that I broke up with my first serious girlfriend. He responded by blaring sad breakup songs as loud as he could throughout the house, just to see me "cry like a bitch". FML
I agree, your life sucks (36726) - you deserved it (5601)
On 05/18/2013 at 6:33pm - love - by SteroidPenguin (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML
I agree, your life sucks (53581) - you deserved it (7627)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23597) - you deserved it (1314)
On 04/03/2012 at 11:40pm - misc - by Eliza - United States (Texas)
Today, while at a store, my stuttering problem became so bad the poor store clerk had to supply my own words for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15085) - you deserved it (1053)
On 04/02/2012 at 8:32pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, in the midst of sleep, my boyfriend hurled my cellphone across the room and into the wall because he couldn't be bothered to pick up or hang up an incoming call. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13319) - you deserved it (2060)
On 04/02/2012 at 3:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30228) - you deserved it (1932)
On 04/01/2012 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by ohgod... - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15565) - you deserved it (6888)
On 04/01/2012 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States
Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12776) - you deserved it (21327)
On 04/01/2012 at 10:03am - love - by Jeff make - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I got sexually excited thinking about what kind of donuts I wanted to get in the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15896) - you deserved it (8641)
On 03/31/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (15216) - you deserved it (2096)
On 03/31/2012 at 12:22am - health - by GetHardOrGoHome - United States (Ohio)
Today, I realized that something's wrong when you have to go to a mental hospital for a family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18396) - you deserved it (1180)
On 03/28/2012 at 10:53pm - misc - by neverthesame - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I had to explain to my 15-year-old son why it wouldn't be a good idea to include a picture of the red Power Ranger in his "Weapons throughout history" project. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11771) - you deserved it (1963)
On 03/28/2012 at 6:49pm - kids - by laststand11 - United States (Kentucky)
Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28531) - you deserved it (1721)
On 02/29/2012 at 2:18pm - misc - by ouch (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7428) - you deserved it (21729)
On 02/28/2012 at 4:03pm - misc - by itshilarious - United States (New York)
Today, someone caused over $400 worth of damage by breaking into my car, just to steal $8 worth of beer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22041) - you deserved it (2428)
On 02/28/2012 at 2:41pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)
Monday 20 May 2013
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