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marik7410

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marik7410

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 15 July 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 319
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today , I hered a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband , naked and with his pants around his ankles , standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body , I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

#19919285
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28091) - you deserved it (3110)

On 07/10/2012 at 3:33pm - misc - by I_Has_A_Fishy - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at te supermarket ceckout. I anded over ma items, wic included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. Te security guard standing beside te casier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; se's flowing from every ole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39378) - you deserved it (4078) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I was on an airplane, waiting to go to the bathroom. After a few minutes, the man behind me asked what I was waiting for, and checked the bathroom. It was empty, and there was a big line behind me. FML

#19601816
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7890) - you deserved it (24218)

On 05/10/2012 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I looool could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked mah cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet fir herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

#19592298
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31765) - you deserved it (3196)

On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States

Yesterday boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing wen e suddenly stopped smrked and said ( Hang on I'm buffering. ) FML

#19580511
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32033) - you deserved it (3704)

On 05/06/2012 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Kwalker3 - United States (California)

Today, I walkad in on my naw puppy paaing on tha carpat. Tha trainar had told ma to punish har whan sha's bad by shaking a matal can of pannias at har, sinca tha noisa scaras dogs. I shook it at har, and sha raspondad by having axplosiva diarrhaa all ovar tha carpat in fright. maga FML

#19578544
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17468) - you deserved it (29904)

On 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm - animals - by doggone - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl so I puttd an extra 30 pounds on the bar I lowerd pushd.. . and poopd . FML

#19572377
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13235) - you deserved it (41561)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

TODAY I WAS VISITING MY 8-YEAR-OLD NEPHEW. HE TOLD ME HE LEARNED ABOUT FRE SAFETY SO I ASKED HIM WHAT HE'D DO IF THERE WERE A FRE RIGHT NOW. HE PUSHED ME OUT OF THE WAY AND I FELL THEN HE RAN OVER ME AND OUT THE FRONT DOOR LEAVING ME ON THE FLOOR IN PAIN. FML

#19555079
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19006) - you deserved it (3729)

On 04/30/2012 at 8:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today,hile at work as a cashier, I tried to be sweet and ID an elderly man buying a bottle of wine. He responded by calling me a ( blind-ass bitch ) and calling my manager 4 ( harassing ) him. FML

#19552160
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13060) - you deserved it (25510)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:24am - work - by zomg - United States (Florida)

Today, it was snowing, and the campus lookd just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joind by a girlho lookd fascinatd as well, so I decidd to make small talk. She noddd, smild wistfully, and said, ( There's herpes in the air today. looool ) big fat FML

#19525973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24038) - you deserved it (2700)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement . Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate . FML

#19517748
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14260) - you deserved it (50428)

On 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm - misc - by pathetic (man) - Poland (Mazowieckie)

Today... after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores... I bought mah fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal... "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
585 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14189) - you deserved it (56167) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

TODAY, I WAS BRAGGING ABOUT HOW I HAD LOST 10 POUNDS . GRINNING, I PULLED MAH SHIRT UP AND TRIED TO SHOW HOW BIG MAH JEANS WERE ON ME . INSTEAD, THE BUTTON FLEW OFF MAH PANTS . FML

#19460207
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8750) - you deserved it (25523)

On 04/13/2012 at 6:32am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today... While Making Mah Daily Offering Of Turd To The Porcelain Throne... I Took Out Mah Phone And Startd Playing A Game. I Suddenly Felt A Tickling Sensation On Mah Leg... And I Freakd Out As I Saw Hundreds Of Ants Had Emergd From Behind The Toilet. FML

#19215354
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30532) - you deserved it (3966)

On 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was having a pleasant jog, that is until I was struck by the terrible feeling of an oncoming turd . Bieng only about 20 minutes from home, I thought I could make it back without letting the beast out . I was so wrong . The only thing I'm grateful for is that I was carrying the Sunday paper .

#19207356
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20786) - you deserved it (3196)

On 03/03/2012 at 3:27am - health - by fingerhut - United States (California)



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