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maraka_musso's FML badges
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maraka_musso's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/15/2013 at 4:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I posted a Facebook status about how I hoped to spend the rest of my life with my boyfriend. A couple of hours later, I saw a comment on it saying he'd never done anything bad enough to deserve that kind of torment. Thanks, mom. FML
by lackadaisy_leah / 05/15/2013 at 12:12pm / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 05/15/2013 at 11:16am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 05/15/2013 at 2:43am / United States / Love
Today, my new neighbor moved in. Because she was fairly young, I offered to mow her grass whenever it needed cut. Her dad then tried to start a fight with me because he thought it was sexual come-on. FML
by Brenden / 05/14/2013 at 7:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up without my fiancé in bed next to me, but I assumed he'd gone to work early. I went on Facebook to find that he had posted a break-up post to himself from my account and set my status to single. I then found a note with "Sorry" written on it stuck to the kitchen counter. FML
by Anonymous / 05/14/2013 at 6:41pm / Love
by for the love of god / 05/14/2013 at 5:35pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me straight in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML
by sumhub94 / 05/14/2013 at 12:48pm / United States / Work
by Liferuinedforever / 05/14/2013 at 3:13am / Pakistan (Sindh) / Kids
by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, a woman approached me in the street and slapped me, ranting about how I stole her man. I don't even know her man, or her, and I live over a thousand miles away in Scotland. I'm back in town for the first time since my childhood to attend a wedding. FML
by culodegrillo / 05/13/2013 at 4:36pm / Spain / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML
by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 3:49pm / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Miscellaneous
by Confused / 05/13/2013 at 10:39am / United States (Maine) / Work
Today, my daughter posted a beautiful, touching status on my Facebook wall for Mother's Day. It wasn't so touching that she'd just copied and pasted the one I wrote for her grandmother and sent it back to me, unedited. FML
by mothers / 05/12/2013 at 1:21pm / United States / Love
by turdtonomor9 / 05/12/2013 at 10:08am / United States / Love
- Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish… Today, after recently moving to Australia, I saw my first kangaroo. In the refrigerated section of…