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mansfield_j

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mansfield_j

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mansfield_j
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 18 March 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1127
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About mansfield_j : I don't really know what to put here

mansfield_j's page activity

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mansfield_j's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32618) - you deserved it (52260)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I met this overweight chick and ended up sleeping with her. We were doing it doggy style and it was great until she said, "Milk me like a cow." I can no longer drink milk without hearing that in my head. FML

#21132249
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49933) - you deserved it (18156)

On 05/06/2014 at 9:55am - intimacy - by chumman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a bird got into the walls of my house through a hole. I located where it was by following the chirping and scratching sounds, and drilled a hole to get it out. I pulled out the drill, only to find the drill bit bloody. Suddenly, no more chirps. FML

#21131587
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48631) - you deserved it (16270)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48585) - you deserved it (4418)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I locked myself out of my dorm room. I walked across campus, shoe-less and in nothing but my bathrobe, to find someone who could let me back in. Turns out I hadn't even shut the door properly and so it never actually locked. I can still hear the guy laughing at me. FML

#21120721
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34678) - you deserved it (12578)

On 04/23/2014 at 10:54am - misc - by killmenow (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52003) - you deserved it (4701)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, after a dental appointment, my lips were numb. On the bus on my way back home, the cutest girl smiled at me. In attempt to smile back, I forgot my lips were numb and ended up spitting my chewing gum at her. I had to switch buses. FML

#21112602
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42456) - you deserved it (5369)

On 04/14/2014 at 6:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Malta

Today, I went to a veterans' reunion party with my grandpa. While there, a guy started yelling at me for having an unapproved haircut. It was my grandpa's old drill sergeant, and he thought I was in the army too. Everyone just smirked as he forced me to drop and do push-ups. FML

#21110214
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33768) - you deserved it (5220)

On 04/11/2014 at 10:51am - misc - by Gomer (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I thought it would be funny to smack my daughter's head gently with a balloon. It hit her hair clip and exploded. She won't stop crying, and my wife will be home any minute. I'm screwed. FML

#21100295
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41236) - you deserved it (17875)

On 03/30/2014 at 4:36pm - kids - by and not even in the good way (man) - United States

Today, I started my first job as a power line technician. My boss's first words to me were, "I have a good feeling about you, kid!" That would've been great if he hadn't said, "Although, the last time I had a good feeling, the guy died." right afterwards. FML

#21085148
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40592) - you deserved it (3313)

On 03/12/2014 at 8:11pm - work - by Anon - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, we had a surprise party for my boss. Someone turned out all the lights. I was so scared of the dark, the first thing my boss saw when he walked in was all my co-workers watching me scream, "TURN IT ON!" FML

#21083937
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32721) - you deserved it (14937)

On 03/11/2014 at 11:47am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mother decided to tell me about how my twin brother almost killed me in the womb when his cord wrapped around my neck. When she left the room, he said, "You won't be so lucky next time." FML

#21081555
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42479) - you deserved it (4261)

On 03/08/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my boss for a few days off next week, because my grandmother passed away yesterday and I'll need to travel to attend the funeral. His response: "She's dead, you're not. You want time off, then quit." FML

#21080680
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55845) - you deserved it (3465)

On 03/07/2014 at 5:31pm - misc - by GLHan (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML

#21080535
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40556) - you deserved it (3237)

On 03/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Jehovah God (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to an auction for the first time. When the run-down house I wanted to bid for came up, I opened bidding at £12,000 and surprisingly won. Feeling pleased, I turned to the person next to me and said, "Lucky me!" She replied, "Yes, lucky you!" and then under her breath said, "Cockhead". FML

#21080041
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35397) - you deserved it (8488)

On 03/06/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by Anonymous -



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