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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 13 January 1993 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6822
  • Number of comments : 406
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About mama2b3 : Hi.. I don't really like filling these out, but if you wanna know something just message me. :) I'm usually on my phone so I might not respond right away.

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mama2b3's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a dump in a public toilet, when a guy in the next stall started drunkenly rapping. He kept trying to get me to rap along with him, eventually bashing the wall and threatening to bust my face in if I didn't. I soon found out I can rap to Slob On My Knob pretty well. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28056) - you deserved it (2915)

On 02/10/2012 at 8:02pm - misc - by rapper in training (man) - United States

Today, I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (10459) - you deserved it (32005)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by WayTooMuchFacebook (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML


I agree, your life sucks (46552) - you deserved it (9728)

On 02/03/2012 at 9:47am - intimacy - by xX_nsn_Xx (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34900) - you deserved it (5365)

On 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States

Today, while I was in the shower, my very drunken mother came home. She then barged into the shower with me, still completely clothed, and gave me the longest, most awkward hug of a lifetime. After she left me still in shock, she came back and did it again. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31351) - you deserved it (2657)

On 11/24/2011 at 10:12pm - misc - by hannahlorraine - United States

Today, I was working the register at our local McDonald's. After a strange man left a massive order, he said, "Can I pay you in gummy worms?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (37375) - you deserved it (4207)

On 06/16/2011 at 2:37am - work - by Hank Gummyworm - United States (Michigan)

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML


I agree, your life sucks (125652) - you deserved it (17017)

On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34382) - you deserved it (8155)

On 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm - work - by stifledbyyou (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML


I agree, your life sucks (40695) - you deserved it (13377)

On 11/19/2010 at 2:47am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML


I agree, your life sucks (61680) - you deserved it (13003)

On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, our class was focusing on discrimination, and our teacher asked us if anyone had ever felt discriminated against. I put my hand up to share a story, and my teacher immediately said "It's because you're ginger, isn't it?" That's not what I was going to say. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43572) - you deserved it (7478)

On 11/02/2010 at 1:43pm - misc - by gingerninja (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went to visit my aunt who recently was released from an institution. She had leftover Christmas cookies so I began snacking on them. They tasted a bit off so I inquired about the ingredients. She told me they only had white icing so she used Crayola markers to give them color. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27863) - you deserved it (5565)

On 01/02/2010 at 8:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after having a shower, I walked back into my room butt naked. As I looked up I saw the window cleaner staring right at me. I looked. He looked. And without thinking I dropped straight to the floor to hid myself, then realized my naked butt was still staring right at him. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19846) - you deserved it (6403)

On 12/10/2009 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I told my boyfriend how happy I was with him. He responded by pulling down his pants and slapping his ass. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36344) - you deserved it (5738)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:11am - love - by neuroticallyours (woman) - United States (Virginia)

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