Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

malait

Offline (yesterday at 4:47am) | Search for a member

malait

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1672
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About malait : Engineer to be

malait's page activity

Visits<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 4:34am<b>lannisters</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 7:55pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:59pm<b>spiers1</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 1:04am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 4:06pm<b>Somefruits</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 11:22am<b>faerieonacid</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 7:44pm<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 3:49am<b>rylaii</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 2:52am<b>okcnation</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 2:11am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 4:42am<b>greeneyebeauty9</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 10:53am<b>cocainewhore</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 5:10am<b>matthewkato</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 6:49pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 3:22am<b>m22100</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 8:56pm<b>ImTheRealBatman</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 3:04am<b>neo08061972</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 12:36am

malait's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of malait's badges

malait's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

#14610612
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44032) - you deserved it (3001) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my family is going to the USA for Christmas after being lucky and getting their tickets re-booked. My ticket was canceled due to the snow, and will not be re-booked. Merry Christmas to me, myself and a bottle of wine. FML

#14269237
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26817) - you deserved it (2441)

On 12/20/2010 at 4:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, a woman laughed after hearing my voice for the first time. This happens whenever I meet someone new, without fail. FML

#14022149
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28466) - you deserved it (2780)

On 11/29/2010 at 9:22am - misc - by Username -

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

#13635730
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27696) - you deserved it (3066)

On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking home down a small street while listening to my iPod. I really got into the music, and started to dance really badly, only to realise there was a car following me, trying to get past. FML

#13547239
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7242) - you deserved it (26904)

On 10/22/2010 at 5:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37467) - you deserved it (3491)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I boarded a trans-Atlantic flight by myself, and struck up a nice conversation with the passenger across the aisle. Before we even took off, the man in front of me unbuckled, stood to face me, and asked me to please shut the hell up. "It's a 9 hour flight, and you're VERY loud!" FML

#13275274
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10471) - you deserved it (31856)

On 10/01/2010 at 10:32am - misc - by northernlass - United States (Ohio)

Today, I injured my knee and dislocated my shoulder fighting over a cookie with my brother. He's 14. I'm 26. He still got the cookie. FML

#12818513
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10966) - you deserved it (32894)

On 08/30/2010 at 6:34am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Oman (Masqat)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

#12030730
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25117) - you deserved it (49193)

On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I felt the urge to sneeze, so out of instinct I looked away from the computer and sneezed to my left. The rotating fan was blowing at my direction at that moment, so I just sneezed on my own face. FML

Today, I saw my boyfriend for the first time in a while. When he came over we realized that we had not only gotten the same haircut, but we were also wearing the same sweater. We are a matching old couple at 17. FML

#8764219
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11065) - you deserved it (21995)

On 03/02/2010 at 12:15am - love - by oldandmarriedapparently (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out my cousin - who suffers from bipolar disorder - shot herself in the chest and has only a 20 percent chance of living. I told my boyfriend, while crying, and he held me for a few minutes. As soon as I got quiet, he pulled out his iPhone and started playing a shooter game. FML

#8364770
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37796) - you deserved it (3813)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:30am - love - by lynn (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the store to buy a new lego set, only to find there weren't any left in stock. I started crying before I could make it out of the store. Oh, and I'm eighteen. FML

#8248390
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9389) - you deserved it (41580)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:43pm - misc - by Tibblesthepengwin (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: