Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

makii06

Search for a member

makii06
  • Town/Country : Toronto, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 27 September 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 2720
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

makii06's last visitors

Edogg215smc3106cinadadanewfiebackflip1molinamattbuhemith780Guyana00chincebuzzjasoniskiingDGross

makii06's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

makii06's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a party and crashed on the bedroom floor. I woke up to sex noises coming from the bed. I pretended to still be asleep. I sent a text to my boyfriend to tell him about it. I heard his phone beep from over in the bed. FML

#8894345
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29308) - you deserved it (2626)

On 03/07/2010 at 2:56pm - intimacy - by woopdeedo_1 (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML

#8889427
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17726) - you deserved it (33671)

On 03/07/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by choldcreations - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I had a sip of my coffee and felt a lump of some kind enter my mouth. I thought it was a bit of biscuit, and then remembered I didn't have biscuits this morning with my coffee. I took it out of my mouth and it was a huge black fly. I then spat the rest of my coffee all over my laptop. FML

#8889347
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23238) - you deserved it (3766)

On 03/07/2010 at 9:08am - misc - by jess (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I found out how mature the guy I'm seeing is. After sex, he took the condom off and hit me in the face with it. FML

#8889344
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21567) - you deserved it (4566)

On 03/07/2010 at 9:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I found out that my 50-year-old Father is the 'Sugar Daddy' to a 20-year-old. He wasted my college funds on her, which I have been dutifully saving for ever since I was 10. FML

#8875865
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33769) - you deserved it (1642)

On 03/06/2010 at 7:49pm - money - by uneducated - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my six year old daughter cut out the stomach area of four of my favorite shirts. When I asked her why she had done so she replied, "So that they fit your tummy better, Mommy." FML

#8864405
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21639) - you deserved it (4200)

On 03/06/2010 at 8:05am - kids - by Fatty (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was upset that my boyfriend hasn't called in a while. Turns out, my step-mother blocked his number so he can't call. She never told me and, instead, just let me think he hated me. FML

#8801800
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23106) - you deserved it (1909)

On 03/03/2010 at 4:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I managed to fall face-first into a used condom. FML

#8801488
218 comments

Today, I finally felt ready to take my bra off during sex. My breasts had "deflated" somewhat due to weight loss and I was really self-conscious about them, but my boyfriend insisted I was hot no matter what. When the bra came off, the dick got soft. FML

#8793926
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27627) - you deserved it (3261)

On 03/03/2010 at 4:24am - intimacy - by victoriassecret - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to take my bra off during sex. My breasts had "deflated" somewhat due to weight loss and I was really self-conscious about them, but my boyfriend insisted I was hot no matter what. When the bra came off, the dick got soft. FML

#8793926
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27627) - you deserved it (3261)

On 03/03/2010 at 4:24am - intimacy - by victoriassecret - United States

Today, I fell asleep in a taxi. So did the taxi driver. FML

#8767827
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28292) - you deserved it (2675)

On 03/02/2010 at 4:14am - misc - by Celeste - Singapore

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38701) - you deserved it (8816)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I learnt that if you accidentally sit on a hamster, instead of dying, it bites your testicles. FML

#8742333
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8158) - you deserved it (33816)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:13am - animals - by ItHurtsLIkeHell (man) - Malaysia (Pulau Pinang)

Today, I was at the gym with my boyfriend. He is a bit feminine, but it has never really bothered me. Until I realised I was lifting heavier weights than he was. FML

#8742158
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20039) - you deserved it (6629)

On 03/01/2010 at 3:53am - love - by Delilah (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

#8741180
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20593) - you deserved it (6995)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:30am - intimacy - by Lovejunkie (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: